Pubdate: Tue, 11 Dec 2001
Source: Edmond Sun, The (OK)
Copyright: 2001 The Edmond Sun
Contact:  http://www.edmondsun.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1591
Author: Pat Nichols
Note: (Pat Nichols, a longtime Edmond resident, is director of Parents 
Helping Parents. The views expressed are his own. He has patterned some of 
his concept after a similar group in Plano, Texas. For more information 
about that program, the Plano Texas School Parent/Student Awareness web 
page address is www.pisd.edu/awarenessline.htm)

WHAT DRUG PROBLEM? READ ON

I know many Edmond parents can't believe we have too much of an alcohol or 
drug problem here in Edmond.

The reason for this is simple - families are embarrassed that they have a 
child who is abusing alcohol or drugs. They believe that you, as well as 
their family and friends, will perceive them as inadequate parents. In 
fact, parents themselves may believe they have failed.

Because of these and other erroneous beliefs, their battle with substance 
abuse in their family and the subsequent disease of addiction becomes a 
well-guarded secret.

You have to sit across the table from a mother and look into her eyes as 
she recalls her last conversation with her son before he committed suicide 
to understand my passion about the subject of alcohol and drug use by our 
youth.

She tells me, "He called me from his cell phone at about 1 a.m. and said 
that he just couldn't take it anymore.

He told me how sorry he was for all the problems he had caused. He was so 
distraught, I said, 'Johnny (not his real name), listen to me,' but he 
wouldn't let me speak. And then I heard the gunshot."

Her eyes are swelling with tears, as are mine; she continues.

"It was one of his friends at the funeral who told me the truth. He was at 
a party and high on LSD. I didn't even know he used drugs; I knew he drank 
too much sometimes.

I was told that he had been using drugs since his sophomore year in high 
school (Johnny was 24 when he committed suicide)."  She couldn't continue.

Johnny grew up in Edmond and began abusing alcohol in high school. His 
parents knew he drank and did their best to discipline him.

Like most parents, they thought this was just a rebellious period and he 
would get through it. In reality, his parents, like most parents, know only 
about a tenth of the real truth.

It's the other nine-tenths of the truth that kill our children. What 
Johnny's parents didn't understand is that teenagers do not understand the 
meaning of the word moderation when it comes to using alcohol or drugs.

Teenagers drink to get high and parents will never know the truth about 
their child's use of alcohol or drugs until it is too late.

A teenager can become addicted to alcohol and/or drugs in less than 15 
months of continual abuse. Once this occurs, your family life will change 
forever.

I have started a support system for parents in Edmond called "Parents 
Helping Parents." It's a phone line where a parent can call and talk to 
someone who has been through the tragedy of kids on drugs or alcohol.

It will be completely anonymous and the group has the endorsement of Edmond 
Juvenile Municipal Court, Edmond Family Services and Edmond Public Schools. 
Callers are completely anonymous.

The primary mission of Parents Helping Parents is to educate and raise the 
awareness of the dangers of alcohol/drug use by our adolescents.

We hope to target parents who are at risk but don't know it and those who 
have just learned that their child is using/abusing alcohol. Many lives can 
be saved by targeting this group before the addiction sets in.

For more information contact: Parents Helping Parents, 629-6384 (recorded 
message) or email:  ---
MAP posted-by: Beth