Pubdate: Thu, 19 Apr 2001
Source: Boulder Weekly (CO)
Copyright: 2001 Bolder Weekly
Contact:  http://www.boulderweekly.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/57
Author: James W. Threadgill

A SIMPLE PLAN

I have, after careful study and years of field research, developed a plan 
that would put an end to the use of all drugs on this planet.

1. Release all biological weapons in the world's remaining arsenals. This 
would almost certainly insure no further drug use by human beings. However, 
it is possible that aliens with compatible physiological characteristics 
may someday land upon Earth's inviting shores, and perhaps encounter the 
villainous marijuana plant, the evil opium poppy, or the contemptible coca 
bush. Therefore, one remaining step must be put into action while there are 
still honest, hard-working drug warriors to implement it.

2. Release all available fungicides, sporacides and chemical defoliants on 
Earth's offending flora. As it would be impossible to single out the 
devil's known plant allies-not mention those not yet discovered-the only 
solution is to blanket all plant life and treat the waters of the rivers 
and oceans with toxic chemicals.

Then and only then, peace would reign and the evil scourge of Satan and his 
drug crazed followers would end. Many, I know, will say that this plan is 
far too extreme, costly and destructive, but with the holy goal of winning 
the drug war once and for all, no price can be considered too high.

James W. Threadgill/Houston
- ---
MAP posted-by: Keith Brilhart