Pubdate: Thu, 24 Oct 2002
Source: Rocky Mountain News (Denver, CO)
Copyright: 2002, Denver Publishing Co.
Contact:  http://www.rockymountainnews.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/371
Author: Jonathan Cohen, Billboard.Com
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/heroin.htm (Heroin)

COBAIN'S DIARY NOTES PUBLISHED

NEW YORK - A letter Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain wrote to his fans about 
his addiction to heroin is among the never-before-seen diary entries to be 
published Nov. 4 by Riverhead Books as Journals. Excerpts from the volume, 
which reproduces more than 270 pages from Cobain's notebooks, appear in 
this week's Newsweek.

In the 1992 letter, written in the aftermath of a stint in drug rehab (and 
excerpted here with typographical errors intact), Cobain described the 
"uncomfortable stomach condition" that had been plaguing him for years and 
how doctors were unable to pinpoint its cause.

"So after protein drinks, becoming a vegetarian, exercise, stopping 
smoking, and doctor after doctor I decided to relieve my pain with small 
doses of heroine for a walloping 3 whole weeks," he wrote. "It served as a 
band-aid for a while but then the pain came back so I quit. It was a stupid 
thing to do and Ill never do it again and I feel real sorry for anyone who 
thinks they can use heroine as a medicine because um, duh, it don't work."

Cobain was never able to permanently wean himself off heroin; large doses 
of the drug were found in his system following his April 1994 suicide.

The letter also reflects Cobain's love/hate relationship with his celebrity 
status, which had reached its zenith by mid-1992.

"I'm really bored with everyones concerned advice like: 'man you have a 
really good thing going. Your band is great. You write great songs, but hey 
man you should get your personal (expletive) together,"' he wrote. "'Don't 
freak out, and get healthy.' Gee I wish it was as easy as that but, 
honestly I didn't want all this attention but Im not freaked out which is 
something a lot of people would like to see. Its an entertaining thought to 
watch a rock figure whos public domain mentally self destruct. But I'm 
sorry friends Ill have to decline."

He ends the letter by writing, "Hope I die before I turn into Pete 
Townshend," in a nod to the Who's My Generation. Cobain's suicide note 
included the line "it's better to burn out than to fade away," from Neil 
Young's Hey Hey, My My (Into the Black).

As previously reported, Cobain's widow Courtney Love recently settled 
long-standing legal issues with surviving Nirvana members Dave Grohl and 
Krist Novoselic, paving the way for the Nov. 12 release of the Universal 
Music Group's best-of- Nirvana collection.
- ---
MAP posted-by: Terry Liittschwager