Pubdate: Wed, 06 Nov 2002 Source: Vancouver Courier (CN BC) Copyright: 2002 Vancouver Courier Contact: http://www.vancourier.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/474 Author: Sandra Thomas U.S. TEEN DRUG ADDICTION EXPERT HERE TO TALK TO PARENTS Kids are more likely to abide by parents' rules if they feel like mom and dad have really listened to them, says a leading North American expert in adolescent drug addiction prevention and treatment. "You have to avoid a power struggle and not freak out when they tell you they've smoked a cigarette, or tried marijuana," said clinical psychologist Dr. Robert Schwebel, who'll speak to parents at Eric Hamber Secondary Nov. 21. Once that dialogue is open, he said, parents can speak to their kids about how often they're using tobacco, drugs or alcohol and how it makes them feel. "That doesn't mean you're being permissive because once you start talking, you can then say to your kids, 'This isn't acceptable and it's going to have to stop,'" he said. "You'll get a much better reception from your child if they feel you've really listened before you make that decision." Schwebel said sometimes parents forget how influential they can be if they keep communication channels open. "It's about giving them the information they need to make the right choices and a way to try and get them thinking." Schwebel, who's been a guest on Oprah, CBS's Early Show and NBC's Today Show, is best known for his Seven Challenges Program for adolescent drug treatment, used in juvenile correctional facilities across Canada, the U.S. and Puerto Rico. He's also the author of Saying No is Not Enough and Keep Your Kids Tobacco Free, maintains a private family counselling practice in Arizona and serves as resident family psychologist at ParentSoup.com, where he answers parents' questions on his popular message board. Schwebel said while many kids think smoking marijuana is harmless, they need to know that it can take away their ambition and inhibit learning processes at a crucial time in their lives. "They need to prepare for their future and careers," he said. "They also need to learn how to interact with their peers. Smoking pot helps them escape or avoid issues, rather than deal with them." He argues it's never too early to talk to kids about drugs, adding parents should address the attractions of drugs and alcohol, not just the evils. "You have to prepare them for the benefits they're going to hear from their peers or older siblings about how tobacco, or drugs or booze, helps them relax or feel more comfortable and how they like the way it feels." Parents can play a role in directing kids toward alternative outlets like sports or hobbies, and anger-management and relaxation techniques, he said. - --- MAP posted-by: Josh