Pubdate: Mon, 22 Apr 2002 Source: New Jersey Herald (NJ) Copyright: 2002, Quincy Newspapers, Inc Contact: http://www.njherald.com/news/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/2162 Author: John Brand FOR 18-YEAR OLD SPARTA MAN-ONE-TIME DRUG USE LEADS TO LIFETIME OF PAIN SPARTA -- The view from her Lake Mohawk home is just shy of heaven -- but she isn't talking about the cool breeze off the lake. Such trivial amenities have lost significance. Joe Linden, of the Kessler Institute in West Orange, wheels in a portable plastic toilet, a commode it's called. "Where's the splash guard?" Gail Morris asks. She bends over and examines the toilet seat and the empty compartment underneath. "I'm not sure. This is from Sweden," Linden replies and hands over the instructions. "Do the Swedes not use splash guards?" she says and musters a rare laugh. Morris sits on the plastic throne, places her arms on the arm rests and leans back. She has the look of an interested buyer, but she knows she has no choice. Linden wheels the toilet into her 18-year-old son's room, parks it about four feet from the bed and returns with the invoice. "Three thousand dollars for this thing," she says before signing. On Thursday, it will be one year since Morris' son, Alex Conte, tried snorting heroin for the first time. That single event has been like a ripple in still water for Morris. He should be graduating from Sparta High School this June. But experimenting with the drug last April has plunged him into the hell of brain damage. "We all think of ourselves as independent and when we do something, we think it shouldn't matter to anybody else," she said with a sigh. "If you take a drug, not only are you setting yourself up for possible ruin, but your whole family is taking the trip with you -- physically, emotionally and financially. The impact is monumental." Morris travels about 1,000 miles each week to the brain trauma center at the John F. Kennedy Medical Center in Edison to visit her son. She hears screams of car accident victims and sees the desolate looks on the faces of other parents whose children are also suffering from a trauma for which there is no cure. Morris, 54, is a self-employed educational consultant but that role has taken a back seat to her full-time job of taking care of her son and herself. "I spend about 100 hours a week caring for him," she said and only about 25 hours is devoted to her job. Any residual hours Morris spends at the gym, working her upper body so she can continue to lift her six-foot-two-inch, 112-pound son off his bed and into a wheelchair. He wears diapers; sips liquid from a straw; speaks in phrases; screams; apologizes; and has a toilet in his bedroom. He only visits home on weekends. He cannot sit upright for more than a minute or two; go for a walk; play his guitar or soccer; remember dates, his cousin's wedding or his former job; have an uninterrupted conversation; drive a car; or sit comfortably in a vehicle for more than an hour. "Are you willing to take a risk of doing this to your body because you think you're going to get some temporary high?" she asked. "It's a huge price to pay." Morris will be at the Center For Prevention and Counseling Wednesday. She will tell her horrific story before a group of about 30 clergy and school board members and business owners. From there the group will travel on a county-wide bus tour stopping at such locations as the Juvenile Detention Center, a local high school, two rehabilitation centers and to various homes affected by drug use, according to Becky Carlson, coordinator for Sussex County Coalition For Healthy and Safe Families. Morris simply wants to spread the word of what happened to her son and that "Nobody's safe." "In Sparta there was an effort to keep this quiet. I don't think a school or community should try to keep this kind of information in the closet," she said. "I don't want to see anybody else in my shoes -- this is certainly a nightmare beyond anything I could ever have dreamed up." On April 25, 2001 Conte opted to try heroin alone in the basement of his mother's home. He snorted a small amount of the opiate and passed out on the downstairs couch. When Morris came home from dropping her daughter, Victoria, off at Colombia University she covered him with a blanket and went to sleep. What she mistook as sleep was actually his overdose. Throughout the night a minimal amount of oxygen got to his brain. Morris' confusion? She talked with him about drugs -- namely heroin. There were no signs indicating what he was considering. He didn't smoke cigarettes, hang out with "bad kids" or come home drunk. He maintained good grades, scored over 1300 on his SATs and ate dinner with his mother every night. "I really can't find anything else I could have done," she said with a heavy sigh. "I guess I had misled myself to thinking that one of my children (couldn't) do something as foolish as this. - --- MAP posted-by: Larry Stevens