Pubdate: Sun, 12 Oct 2003
Source: Laurel Leader-Call (MS)
Copyright: 2003 Laurel Leader-Call
Contact:  http://www.leadercall.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1662
Author: Brian Livingston

'DEMON' KEPT PULLING MILEY BACK TO DRUGS

Gene Miley, who is awaiting sentencing for burglary in Jones County, agreed
to an interview detailing his past as a drug addict, enforcer, and father.
This is the second of a three-part series written from the interview which
took place at the Jones County Adult Detention Center recently. It is both
graphic and heartbreaking in its subject matter. Miley wanted to use this
opportunity to inform young and old about the trappings of drug addiction
and the type of life you will be led into if you chose this path. The
contents may be offensive to some readers.

While growing up in probably the roughest area of Jackson, in a very short
time, Gene Miley went from having all the friends and support a guy could
want to having none.

Miley was 23 at the time, but had been in the drug trade with all of its
trappings for many years. Miley had seen his mother and father die from
overdoses. Moreover, he had experienced the landslide that would come from
becoming a drug addict. His addiction is what caused him to fall out of
favor with his drug cohorts and become a marked man. In isolating himself,
Miley had to change from a member of the pack to a loner. It was while he
was alone in a solitary confinement cell Miley began to believe there was a
purpose for him in this world and in order to realize what it was, he was
going to have to go straight.

"You have a lot of time to think when you are laying in a dark cell for 12
straight months," Miley said. "It was 130 degrees in the summertime and the
only thing you could do was get naked and lay on the concrete floor. That
was the coolest place to be."

Miley had been placed in the cell when he stabbed a fellow inmate at
Parchman Prison after some altercation.

"It really wasn't a big deal. No charges were filed," Miley said.

Miley's time in the 6X9 cell in 32-B Lock-down made him realize certain
things:

One, there isn't a whole lot to do in a cell by yourself for an entire year;

Two, even though he believed in God, he wasn't the church-going type. He
figured there were too many hypocrites out there without him contributing to
the population; and,

Three, he wanted to experience the other side of life. The kind of life
where real men get real respect. Not the kind of respect garnered through
threats and fear, like Miley was so familiar with. But the kind of respect
earned when you do the right thing. The kind of respect from holding down an
honorable job, raising a family, and treating others in a respectful manner.

Wish came true

While in the isolation cell, Miley began to grow the first vestiges of a
conscious. It would be a long and painful process.

Later, Miley did another stint in jail after being accused of murdering a
drug dealer in his old neighborhood. He was eventually cleared of that
charge but he still had to answer for other deeds. During those 17 months in
the County Penal Farm in Raymond, Frank Melton came into Miley's life again.
Before, Melton had tried to intervene when Miley was much younger but
Miley's dad wouldn't have it. This time Melton made Miley an offer he
couldn't refuse.

"He told me if I'd go with him to Houston for six months, he wouldn't bother
me anymore," Miley said. "At that point in my life, I was willing to go
anywhere if it meant my getting straight."

In 1995, at the age of 25, Miley came back to Mississippi and settled in
Hattiesburg where he met a girl. He said the petite blond was the most
beautiful creature he'd ever seen and they ended up getting married. She had
two boys from a previous marriage and the couple soon added two more boys to
the mix.

Miley's grandparents died and left him an inheritance of $365,000, three
rent houses in Jackson and 80 acres of land. Miley was married to a woman he
loved, he had great kids, he had money, a job, and with his three years of
being straight, he had the honorable respect he so craved.

"Life couldn't have been better," he said. "There was always plenty of food
in the cabinets. Our bills were paid on time and without any burden on us.
We both had decent jobs. The kids were great kids who said 'Yes sir and no
sir." People referred to me as Mr. Miley, not out of fear but out of genuine
respect for what I was doing. I almost passed out the first time someone
called my Mr. Miley."

For the first time while relating his story, Miley is showing emotion. The
voice cracks when talking of the good times with his family. His eyes became
misty when recounting the days with his sons. And the pride of being able to
accomplish what for so many years seemed an impossible dream welled up
inside him. It was almost as if he was back in that time not so long ago
reliving the laughs and joys.

"I finally figured out what it meant to being a real man," Miley said
quietly. "God, it felt good."

Back to the 'life'

Underneath it all, the good times, the family reunions, real Christmas
celebrations, lay the demon. Miley referred to him as being cunning to the
point of being of the devil. Patient to the point of being godlike. Miley
soon would be snapped back into the world of self-destruction. He didn't ask
for it, but he allowed it to happen.

"At work one day a kid comes up to me and said, 'You ever done any crystal?'
That's all it took," Miley said.

Slowly but surely Miley got back into the "life." He began staying gone for
hours, then days, then weeks at a time. His wife, who had been a past user,
finally cornered him in a motel during one of his lengthy trips.

"I was so ashamed," Miley said. "I didn't want to do the drugs at home
because I didn't want to be responsible for her starting back. I didn't want
to expose my kids to it like my parents did me. That is how I rationalized
my behavior. That's how I justified it."

Eventually, Miley did get his wife back in the throes of drugs. They would
spend days in their bedroom while their 16-year old son watched his younger
brothers. As time went by, the inheritance dried up, the vehicles were gone,
and they were being evicted from their home.

"I had done the unthinkable," Miley said. "I had now brought this down on
everyone I loved. When I look back on it, I can't believe I was so stupid."

A difference

Even though this was a tragedy, Miley began to see the difference in
himself. No longer was his life about him but also about others. Through
love and starting a family, Miley had learned to trust others like never
before. He had also developed compassion, and a sense of responsibility to
others he'd never had.

He admitted himself into Pine Grove for drug treatment. He followed that up
with three months in the Next Step Program from the facility and then
entered into Clearview in Moselle. All of these helped with the support of
his family, but he knew the demon still lurked inside him and would never
completely go away.

Another home was purchased and quickly paid off. So was the land around it.
He wouldn't have his family homeless again.

"Everything seems to be going again," Miley said. "I have my second chance.
Guess what? I blow this out of the water."

A party invitation seemed innocent enough. Miley balked at first because it
was at a bar in Petal but he was talked into it by some friends. Miley told
his wife they would go and make an appearance. After a short time they would
leave. He knew the potential problems the bar would create for him. He knew
his penchant for self-destruction was a distinct possibility. Yet he agreed
to go.

"At the time I was friends with a lot of the Petal police officers and I
thought surely they wouldn't let me get out of control. They knew my history
because I didn't attempt to hide it from them but they accepted me
nonetheless. I appreciated that. I was thankful the very people who were the
enemy so many years ago were willing to let bygones be bygones. They didn't
judge me," Miley said.

Afterall, it was a birthday celebration for one of his officer friends and
he didn't want to offend him either.

As the minutes passed into hours, the alcohol flowed into Miley. He lost
control to the extent that when a fight broke out between two other men in
the bar, he stepped in and broke it up proclaiming he was a cop.

"I was asked to leave. One of the officers said he would drive me home but I
said I could drive right down to the road to my house. I was mad and my wife
was mad at me," Miley said shaking his head.

Sitting outside the bar with its engine running sat a 1994 Porsche. There
was no driver and Miley chose the Porsche over the truck in which his wife
sat fuming. A half hour later, Miley was stopped in downtown Petal for
speeding. He was clocked doing 122 mph in a 35 mph zone. He was arrested for
driving under the influence and taken to the Petal Police Department and
eventually to the Forrest County Jail.

Left to think about his latest mistake for four days by his wife, Miley was
placed on bond and released. It was yet another low point in his life and
that of his family.

When Miley returned to the Forrest County Sheriff's Office to collect his
personal belongings taken from him when he was arrested, he was asked to
wait until an investigator had a word with him. Miley didn't see what was
coming because frankly, he couldn't remember what happened at all the night
of the party and his DUI arrest.

"The investigator asked me about the car I was driving and I said, 'What
car,'" Miley remembered. "He told me the car was reported stolen and that I
was being arrested for grand larceny of an auto. A convicted felon stealing
a car. I knew I was going to prison again."

After bonding out again on the new charge, Miley began drinking all the
time. One of his episodes led to yet other charges. The life Miley had
worked so hard to find and keep was spinning away from him yet again. This
time he knew it would be almost impossible to get back.
- ---
MAP posted-by: Josh