Pubdate: Sun, 02 Mar 2003
Source: Register-Guard, The (OR)
Copyright: 2003 The Register-Guard
Contact:  http://www.registerguard.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/362
Author: John Fluent, Eugene

ASHCROFT HAVING PIPE DREAMS

Attorney General John Ashcroft says the illegal drug paraphernalia industry 
has invaded our homes. The invasion apparently occurred without our 
knowledge. One of the investigations has been named "Pipe Dreams," which 
describes Ashcroft's behavior even before he was appointed to office.

The next logical step in Ashcroft's drug war will be to go after the 
manufacturers of stick matches. Presumably stick match paraphernalia has 
been implicated in the business of smoking drugs, and those match 
manufacturers should be jailed immediately and all their match boxes hauled 
away as evidence of criminality.

Since reading Ashcroft's statement, I have carefully searched our home. So 
far, I have found no evidence of a paraphernalia invasion, but I did find 
an attractive glass pipe my wife said came from Avon. I always knew the 
people in the perfume industry were covering up something!

JOHN FLUENT

Eugene
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MAP posted-by: Larry Stevens