Pubdate: Tue, 26 Oct 2004 Source: Sun Herald (MS) Copyright: 2004, The Sun Herald Contact: http://www.sunherald.com Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/432 Author: Margaret Baker Note: other clippings in this series at http://www.mapinc.org/source/Sun+Herald+(MS) Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/pot.htm (Cannabis) Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/coke.htm (Cocaine) Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/hallucinogens.htm (Hallucinogens) Lost Lives, Lost Chances THE TALE OF TWO ADDICTS OCEAN SPRINGS - For Rebecca and Joseph, finding their way to sobriety meant the difference between life and death. Though the Ocean Springs couple, now sober for two years, didn't know each other while they were using, their paths to addiction started in much the same way. "My drug of choice was more, more of anything," said Joseph, 29, and now a recovering addict who celebrated his second year of sobriety in August. "It started out drinking... not necessarily because it made me fit in but it made me forget that I didn't. I started drinking... pretty much three or four days a week, mostly beer and occasionally whiskey, either Southern Comfort or Wild Turkey." Over the next 15 years, Joseph's addictions grew to include not only alcohol, but also marijuana, cocaine, both powdered and crack, and prescription narcotics. He would become a gambling addict and thief before he got the help he needed to stay clean. Like Joseph, Rebecca took her first drink at 15. She never liked prescription drugs but she loved her alcohol, slamming down beers from the time she got up every morning to the time she passed out every night. She also used crack and smoked marijuana occasionally. Rebecca would end up with an eating disorder, an arrest record and the threat of losing her firstborn son to the state before she would find the courage to get sober. For Joseph and Rebecca, sobriety had taken on a new meaning. It simply meant no more alcohol or drugs. "I probably would have died if I hadn't done something," Joseph said. "I'd be dead or either in prison. I was in bad shape. I'm happy now." Joseph Shares His Story Joseph started out drinking with friends in Vancleave, mostly hanging out in the woods. In a matter of months, he was drinking up to a case of beer a night. By the time he was 17 and attending Ocean Springs High School, drinking had become a daily habit. He'd started buying 3-liter soda bottles, emptying half and refilling them with vodka or some kind of Schnapps, and heading to school. During breaks between classes, he was filling empty soda cans with the cocktail he'd smuggled onto school property. "The first time I did it, I was in second period Spanish class," he said. "I ended up getting sick by fourth period. I threw up in the bathroom and went back to class. "My eyes were watery, but no one knew. I pretty much did that every day. It felt good keeping that buzz. And I thought it made me feel comfortable. I'd felt awkward the rest of my life. So I thought why only drink alcohol on the weekends when I could feel good all the time? I always wanted to be popular." Joseph got his wish his senior year when he and a friend were drunk and hit by a car outside a bar in Biloxi. "The whole year, I was known as the guy who got hit by the car," he said. "I finally got popular. My friend could've died. His arm went through the (car) window. He was drinking a lot. He was bleeding a lot. I imagine he had to go to the hospital." Joseph can't remember. But he moves on to his life after high school at Mississippi Gulf Coast Community College. It was there he met an old high school running buddy and started smoking marijuana and crack. Before long, he was shooting up the prescription narcotic Dilaudid. What is it? Upper? Downer? Pain medication? "He had the marijuana," Joseph said. "I started buying it on a regular basis. I was working at the mall. We'd work high. It wasn't a problem because the guys I worked with got high, too." At 18, Joseph's drug use had grown even more and he was using LSD and prescription narcotics, taking as many as six painkillers a week that he mixed with his alcohol and anything else he could find. "I'd try anything," he said. After junior college, Joseph moved to Hattiesburg to attend William Carey College. By then, he knew his life was spiraling out of control, and he tried to stay clean. "My family was a strong Christian family," he said. "I thought if I could hang with some good Christian kids, I would do good. That lasted about three months." Joseph met the man who would be his roommate and drug dealer soon after he moved to Hattiesburg. Soon after, Joseph started using again. He quit going to class and within a year was asked to leave the campus. He couldn't keep a roommate and had gotten caught tearing up school property when he was driving drunk. Joseph dropped out of school, cashing in on the tuition money his parents had sent for school to move into an apartment with a man that would become his dealer. He was using a lot of cocaine and other drugs, taking as many as 120 hits of LSD in a 10-day span - all by the time he reached the age of 22. "I was shooting up Dilaudid about three or four times a month," he said. His parents would learn that their son had dropped out of college, had been arrested for shoplifting and was using a laundry list of narcotics and alcohol. Joseph said he was high on cocaine when he was arrested in 1997 and charged with misdemeanor shoplifting. His parents learned of his arrest after they received a notice in the mail to remind Joseph of his upcoming court date. "My mom was all crying," he said. "My dad wanted to kill me." He moved back to South Mississippi when he was 24, only after police officers started watching his apartment in Hattiesburg because Joseph and his roommate were letting a drug runner stay with them on his way from Texas to Florida. Joseph lived with friends and his parents off and on after his return to South Mississippi. He went through several jobs, working at one car dealership after another and spending an estimated $2,000 on drugs a month and gambling away the rest. He eventually was arrested for drunk driving and charged with possession of drug paraphernalia and other moving violations. By then, he also was stealing items to help pay for his addictions. "I always thought that alcoholics lived under bridges in cardboard boxes," he said. "It's not true. It (the disease) doesn't discriminate." Joseph had lost another job when he found himself telling his family the truth about his life. "For some reason, at that time, I couldn't decide what to do," he said. "I needed to find a job, and I was sitting on my parent's couch. That was the first time I admitted I couldn't control myself. I told my parents I didn't even think I could get a job. I was brain dead, I told them. "I knew I was killing myself with the drugs and alcohol, but I didn't care. I wasn't going to put a bullet in my head so I went the slow route." Joseph, whose mother was at one time the director of a drug rehabilitation center for addicts, went through a detox in Biloxi before heading to a treatment center in Phoenix to become sober. His wife would get sober about two months later. They didn't know each other at the time. "We didn't meet each until after we got sober," Rebecca said. "We didn't meet through AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) or NA (Narcotics Anonymous). We didn't know each other when we were using. Thank God for that." - --- MAP posted-by: Richard Lake