Pubdate: Tue, 30 Nov 2004 Source: Ladysmith-Chemanius Chronicle (CN BC) Copyright: 2004 BC Newspaper Group & New Media Contact: http://www.ladysmithchronicle.com Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1279 Author: Edward Hill Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/meth.htm (Methamphetamine) METH ADDICT TELLS CAUTIONARY TALE For one young Ladysmith girl, this year's Light-Up festival is a bittersweet anniversary. One year ago to the day, while the crowds applauded the fireworks, she snorted her first hit of methamphetamine. >From that point, her life became a sad cautionary tale of drug abuse. Using only on weekends quickly devolved into weeklong binges. She traded school for tripping out in meth houses. A home for the streets. Life for a high. "Going from a happy home to nothing, you feel like you're in Hell," says "Jane", a teenage meth addict who chose to speak out on conditions of anonymity. "I want to warn other kids not to do it." Jane couldn't nail down exactly why she started using. By any measure she was a typical teenager. She had plenty of friends, did well in school and didn't have self-esteem issues beyond a usual teenage girl. Home life was good and she wasn't abused. But she frequented a friend's house, smoking pot with adults who she coined "closet junkies." Jane had experimented will all kinds of drugs, and one evening when a line was free for the taking, it was just another to add to the list. "Adults around me were using meth; my friend's dad was giving it away," she says. "The first time I used was exactly one year ago at Light-Up." The meth, of course, acted as it does. The pleasure centres of her brain and nervous system were amplified to the max. She was euphoric, upbeat and able to concentrate. "Everybody seemed really friendly," she says. Amphetamines - of which methamphetamine is a derivative - were originally designed for weight loss, anxiety, attention deficit disorder and even a nasal decongestant. It alters the neurotransmitter serotonin, which, not coincidentally, influences mood, appetite, sleep and sexual inclinations. Unfortunately, meth will permanently stunt serotonin-linked neurotransmission in the brain, even after one hit. The brain is unable to again provide the kind of exultant pleasure from the first time around, pushing users to take more frequent and larger doses. Enough meth will lead to psychosis or will eventually overwhelm the nervous system, causing death. Jane and her friends became binge junkies, cranking everyday for a month, then recharging clean for a couple weeks. Typical of meth heads, they would stay awake for up to nine days straight playing cards or running around in the woods. Doing arts and crafts. Cleaning. After about three days it's no longer a drug high, Jane says, but insanity setting in. And the paranoia took hold. Jane started hearing voices and felt those around her were saying hateful things. Shadows started moving like in a nightmare, so she had to start sleeping with the lights on. To this day, sober, she still sees the dark, ebbing forms. "You feel dead coming down," Jane says, "It felt like my soul was sucked out. I was walking around lifeless, not capable of being human." Jane's parents were unable to handle her erratic, increasingly delusional behaviour. Her weight dropped dramatically, she was expelled from school and was eventually kicked out of her home. But a network of users between the town and Nanaimo provided a place to crash, in exchange for drugs. Meth is cheap, about $10 per "point" or a tenth of a gram. It was easy to find in Ladysmith, she says, usually from dealers operating in "Candy Crack Lane" running behind the Traveller's Inn to the Island Hotel. She says adults would often give it away, or she and her crew would dabble in auto break-ins to finance the habit. Unlike other girls, Jane avoided falling into the sex-trade despite pressures from pimps and dealers. "I've never been abused, I was protected," Jane says. "I got offers to buy dope for sex, but it's degrading. I never lowered myself to that level." In the first week of November Jane hit bottom, using more than 20 points a week, never sleeping and never eating. She decided to get help, to pull out of her self-imposed cycle of destruction. "I felt horrible and I wanted to change. It was just getting worse and worse," she says. "I wasn't making any plans for my future. It felt like I was awake and dreaming at the same time." While Jane is a testament to the easy slide into drug addiction, she is also a testament to the astounding resiliency of youth. She has been clean for three weeks with help from the Ladysmith Resource Centre, is back at home and will get back in school soon. "Now I have to make myself busy, to never have time to do drugs," she says. "And I stay away from the downtown area; it's a trigger zone." And she looks like a normal, healthy teenager with none of the gaunt, wasted features typical to addicts. But she points out the chemical burns in her nose and throat from smoking and snorting meth. "My life has become a giant circle. The wool was pulled over my eyes for a one-year trip," Jane says. "And I still see the shadows move." Anyone needing help with addictions can call the Ladysmith Resource Centre at 245-3079. - --- MAP posted-by: Larry Seguin