Pubdate: Fri, 26 Nov 2004 Source: Albert Lea Tribune (MN) Copyright: 2004 Albert Lea Tribune Inc. Contact: http://www.albertleatribune.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/3521 Author: Ann Austin, Tribune staff writer Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/meth.htm (Methamphetamine) A FATHER FIGHTS TO RECLAIM HIS DAUGHTER FROM METH ADDICTION "She was on her way to having a great life," said Conrad Petersen, the father of "Michelle," a meth addict. Michelle was a high school teacher in Arizona, recently married and the mother of a young boy. "Basically everything was going great," said Petersen. Ironically enough, it was at a school function where she was offered methamphetamine for the first time, about two years ago. The straight-A student who only smoked and drank in moderation, was quickly pulled in to the lifestyle of an addict. "It was almost instantaneous. She started on this down-hill drive," Petersen said. Any time she and her husband, "Paul" would go out, she would look for meth. Eventually Paul asked for a divorce. He never approved of her use of drugs and her addiction had come to the point where he couldn't live with her anymore. Petersen heard of the divorce and decided to fly down from Hollandale, Minn. to see his daughter. He was astonished at what he found. Michelle and Paul, whose real names have been protected, had built a brand-new house in a nice community; it wasn't even six months old. "There was garbage everywhere," Petersen said. The garage door was hanging halfway off, the front door looked like it had been broken in several times. Inside the house, Petersen found his grandson, "Michael," (real name has also been protected) with a blanket wrapped around him, only his face was showing. A jar of peanut butter had been licked clean beside the boy, there was no other food in the house. More trash was strewn inside all the rooms, black bugs filled the sink, holes in the walls and cat feces in the carpet. Electricity had been shut off and it was about 115 degree inside. "The house was completely destroyed," he said. A search for his daughter found her asleep on a bed, completely passed out. When Petersen woke her and asked what happened to her home, she acted like nothing was wrong. "This was a girl that was clean as clean can be, before," he said. Michelle told him she had money and a job, but Petersen later found out that she had been fired from her teaching job and had applied for and received a grant for $2500 by claiming she was returning to school for her master's degree. "Everything she was saying was a lie," he said. Petersen stayed in the area for a while and found out from local law enforcement that his daughter had 20 felony charges and was well-known as being a trouble-maker, all just six months after her first hit of meth. One of the officers told Petersen how Michelle acted when he pulled her over for a broken tail light. "The police officer thought she was insane. He'd never seen anybody so wild and crazy. She was out of control completely." Michelle swore at the officer and accused him of being out to get her. "This just wasn't the person that I'd known," Petersen said. "It's not the house and the husband; the person was gone. My daughter was gone. The person that I had known was not there. It was awful." Petersen contacted his ex-wife, who also lived in Arizona, and they took Michael out of the area. He is now in the custody of Paul. "The thing that amazed me the most was that my daughter didn't care," he said. But Michelle said she wanted to stop using and was enrolled iinto a treatment center. It didn't last. Two days later she was home again, to a house that was being foreclosed on and no car. She ended up living underneath an culvert with other meth-users. "She had nothing left," Petersen said. "There was no reasoning for what she did. She did things that were so out of character and made no sense. "She was someone who could care less about life. Nothing else mattered but the next place she could get crystal meth. "All she did was hate, she was full of hate." Michelle was physically different, with large sores on her face and body that she attributed to a rash. She was very thin, about 90 pounds and her hair was matted and straw-like, as if she hadn't washed it for a long time. Petersen believed she was doing meth almost constantly and was always sniffling, but said she had a cold. "I didn't want to touch her. I didn't want to hug her goodbye," he said. Her attitude grew worse. Petersen had traveled back to Minnesota and Michelle would call him in the middle of the night begging for money, sometimes threatening him she would have to get it some other way if he hesitated to agree. She threatened suicide 10 times, he said. He sent her money, paid her electricity bill, bought her six cars (which she sold telling him they were junk), and sent her three house payments. In the meantime, Petersen hired an attorney to handle Michelle's 20 felonies. The attorney was able to decrease her sentence to two months in tent city, a camp in Arizona where people are treated as prisoners. "She came out and it wasn't even three months later and she was right back at it," he said. The attorney had told him the worst thing to do was to send money, so after spending thousands and thousands of dollars, Petersen cut financial ties and gave his daughter an ultimatum. "You do whatever you want," he told her. "It's your choice." He told her she could talk to him as much as she wanted, but there would be no more money. It was hard for him to let her fend for herself, but some of her anger seemed to go away. "When I quit telling her what to do I think it helped," he said. Michelle called him, still asking for money, but Petersen stayed firm. Eventually he was able to get her into a halfway house after her parole officer urged that it was one of the best options. "She's been staying there and goes to work every day," he said. She works at a grocery store in customer service and wears an ankle bracelet at all times. The bracelet monitors if she spends time with another former user or if she deviates from her job or the halfway house. If Michelle is found using again, she will automatically serve 18 years in prison. Michelle still denies she was or is chemically dependent, but she has begun to show signs of her old self. She wants to see Michael, and has been allowed to see him since she's been at the halfway house. Petersen can even tell a difference over the phone. "She would talk very fast and with very short words. I couldn't understand her before. Now she speaks and I understand her. She's talking more clearly," he said. "I'm hoping and praying that she's okay, but she's got a long way to go," Petersen said. "I've been lied to so many times that I don't know what to do any more." As a parent, Petersen said letting his daughter fend for herself was the hardest thing he's had to do, but it's the only way an addict will hit the bottom and be ready to recover. "It's important to let them you that you love them and you will be there," he said. But you can't give in to their begging. He told her: "I love you, I'm here, but you have to make those choices. There's nothing I can change. I can't tell you what to do anymore because you're not making sense to me." Meth isn't worth it, Petersen said. "For any kids in high school today even considering doing crystal meth, they better take a long, long, long, long look at some of the things going on with these people. If that's what they choose for their life, there's something wrong. There's no way one hour of ecstacy is worth a life-time of hell," he said. - --- MAP posted-by: Jo-D