Pubdate: Tue, 26 Jul 2005
Source: Langley Advance (CN BC)
Copyright: 2005 Lower Mainland Publishing Group Inc.
Contact:  http://www.langleyadvance.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1248
Author: Bob Groeneveld

ODD THOUGHTS: TUNNEL VISION TOTALLY CRIMINAL

Sometimes criminals can be downright ingenious, can't they?

Creative genius - even of the criminal sort - is such a rare commodity 
these days, that you have to admire it, even if so in a reluctant sort of way.

For instance, haven't you ever wished for an easier way across the border?

Especially on one of those hot summer long weekends when it seems like it's 
taking forever for the border guards to get through those hundreds of cars 
lined up ahead of you?

When it seems the customs officers must be searching every corner of every 
trunk, underneath every back seat _ in every hubcap, even, don't you just 
wish there was an easier way to get through to the other side to the place 
where you'd really rather be?

Did you ever once think of digging a tunnel to get past that traffic jam?

I bet not!

I know sure as heck I never did.

But neither you nor I should feel badly about that.

We shouldn't feel intellectually inferior over not having come up with such 
a simple solution to cross-border traffic tie-ups and haughty border guards 
who never have anything better to do than ask you dumb questions like 
"Where are you coming from?" and "Where are you going to?"

I mean, seriously, folks, if I'm heading south, then I'm "coming from" 
Canada and I'm "going to" the United States, and my "coming from" and 
"going to" aren't much harder to figure out if I'm going the other way.

Neither you nor I may have thought of tunneling across, but at least I can 
figure out the directions - and I suspect it's not a huge leap for you, either.

If we didn't come up with the clever idea of tunneling under the border 
guards to avoid those pesky - and time-consuming - questions, it only 
proves that we don't have criminal minds.

And maybe it also proves that neither you nor I felt we had to be too 
terribly concerned about whether or not the customs officers were going to 
search every corner of your trunk, underneath your back seat _ or even in 
your hubcaps.

I mean, seriously: who keeps an extra block of cheese or an orange in their 
hubcaps?

Criminals - even those who are able to come up with an occasional genius 
insight - can't be all that bright.

I mean, the U.S. attorney gloating over the capture of three 
"poison"-toting Canadians was absolutely right when he pointed out, "They 
were smart enough to build a sophisticated tunnel, but not smart enough not 
to get caught."

Now, even if you discount the fact that there has to be an easier way to 
say that, that U.S. attorney still has a good point there.

But they were still smart enough to come up with the idea.

I just can't get over that thought.

And what it may mean.

Does it mean that the "criminal mind" suffers occasional lapses into genius?

Or maybe it only suffers occasional lapses out of genius, and into the 
realm of stupidity?

If the former is the case, then it is entirely understandable that 
tunnel-digging criminals intent on subverting the anti-drug culture of our 
neighbours to the south would inevitably be caught.

If the latter is the case, however, then we must ask ourselves how many 
tunnels may have been operating successfully, perhaps for years.

After all, we can only analyse the minds of the criminals who get caught.
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MAP posted-by: Beth