Pubdate: Tue, 27 Dec 2005 Source: San Bernardino Sun (CA) Copyright: 2005 Los Angeles Newspaper Group Contact: http://www.sbsun.com/writealetter Website: http://www.sbsun.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1417 Author: Selicia Kennedy-Ross, staff writer KIDS FINDING FREE REIN AFTER SCHOOL Parents' Absence Creates Little Supervision REDLANDS - After 3 p.m., school's out and nobody's watching. Outside the cradle of the schoolyard, away from parents' watchful eyes and campus discipline the kids are on their own until their parents come home from work. When kids fight at school, administrators intervene, says 13-year-old Tiffany Giuliano-Rodgers. When they fight in the streets, no one is there to care. Tiffany is one of the nearly 8 million children in the United States who are home alone while their parents work, generally between 3 and 6 p.m. A 2001 report by the U.S. Department of Education revealed that about 8 million school-age children, half of whom are between 5 and 12, are unsupervised after school. In the wake of recent violence that claimed the lives of two girls, 16 and 11, community focus is centered on keeping kids safe and out of trouble. According to a 1999 study by the U.S. Justice and Education departments, the time when kids are most likely to drink, smoke, take drugs or engage in sexual behavior is between the hours of 2 and 6 p.m. Tiffany and her friends agree the time for trouble falls between the close of school and their parents arriving home. That is also the most likely time for them to become the victim of a crime. On a recent day with Tiffany: At 3:45 p.m., Tiffany has just come home from school. She sweeps the back steps and plays with her four dogs before going inside. The eighth-grader, a dead ringer for Disney's fun-loving Raven Symone, stays at home by herself while her mom works. She has a snack and hangs out in her room, talking on the phone to her friend, Aaron McCogg, who isn't feeling well. Her 15-year-old neighbor, Anthony Roque, shows up and the two hug. Anthony seems protective of her. Together, the two set off to visit Aaron. It's dusk on this Wednesday in December as Tiffany and Anthony make the trek to meet their friends, several blocks from their neighborhood on Sixth Street. The pair must cross the busy intersection of Brockton Avenue and Texas Street, as they head for a neighborhood police say is high in crime. Aaron, 14, comes out of his house and joins his friends on the curb. Soon, Kareshea Wright, 17, stops by. A few others come out and say hello but don't stick around. Tiffany gets excited when she sees each of her friends, greeting everyone joyously, yelling their names and hugging them. Today, it's only the four of them. Sometimes the group goes to a park nearby or just hangs out in the street in front of someone's house. They stand around talking, and Tiffany and Anthony press for details about a friend of theirs in the neighborhood who was "jumped" by a group after dark. The victim, a girl with long, wavy hair, comes out of her house briefly but goes back inside when her mother calls. The teens talk openly about how, in the past, they or their friends have experimented with sex, drugs and smoking after school. They recall last summer's "pool-hopping" incident jumping into the swimming pool of a nearby hotel, a mischievous act that led to appearances in juvenile court, a fine, community service and probation for breaking the city's 10 p.m. curfew. They also admit to smoking and "blazing," smoking marijuana in the park or in each other's back yards. It's easy to mask the odor of cigarettes with incense, room deodorizer and spray perfume, the kids say. Alcohol, however, is much harder to get, and cigarettes are becoming more expensive. Cigars, however, are not only cheap, but are easy to buy. "You go down to the corner store, and that guy won't sell us beer," Tiffany says. "But if you ask for a cigar he asks you what kind you want." Blacks & Mild is a popular cigar choice, and even the fruit-flavored kind such as apple, cinnamon, cherry and kiwi are favorites, the teens say. At 75 cents per cigar, they are far more affordable and longer-lasting than a pack of 20 cigarettes that can sell for more than $4. "You can smoke it, then stub it out and save it and then smoke it again later," Anthony said. "It lasts forever. You can't do that with a cigarette." Drugs, too, are plentiful and easy to come by, especially if "someone you know hooks you up." "You don't even have to ask usually," Tiffany says. "They just offer." The others nod in agreement. "Sharing is caring," Anthony says. "Don't be greedy." The group laughs. Kareshea is the eldest. Her serious demeanor makes her seem more mature than her 17 years. A teen mom, Kareshea admits that she had sex with her boyfriend after school while her mother was at work. She says she can't do anything like she used to, even hanging out outside with her friends, because her freedom is restricted while she cares for her child. "I haven't been outside in so long," she says quietly. Their freedom ends when the clock strikes 6 p.m. Once the parents come home, it's all different. "You have to run home and change your clothes like you've been up in the house all day," Kareshea says. Aaron, whose father works at home, said he has a lot of freedom. That is, until his mother comes home. That's when he generally starts his homework or his assigned chores. And once she's there, he's inside for the night. "She works long shifts," Aaron says. "I just decide to stay home to help my mom out. "But if it's too late, I can't go outside. With my mom, I have to be in before 9 and do chores like clean up the kitchen or cook dinner." His mother was upset about the curfew ticket, Aaron says, and doesn't want him to get another one. She is worried about him getting into more trouble. Aaron admits he has friends who are in gangs but says "common sense" keeps him from choosing that path. "Why be in a gang honestly what's so cool about being in a gang?" the 14-year-old says. "Just to prove you're somebody? It makes no sense at all." Aaron's father, Vincent McCogg, is surprised at some of his son's exploits and says he will be keeping a closer eye on the teen. His two sons haven't gone out much in the past month or so because they were both grounded. "If there is a problem, we all sit down and talk about it as a family," McCogg says. "That's family time." These days, Aaron says he is trying to stay out of trouble, spending more time in his room with his electric blanket, satellite television and the Internet. Aaron's parents were living apart until about a year ago when his mother moved back in. Before that, kids from the neighborhood were always in the McCogg's house. "Everyone would be eating up my food and stealing my games," Aaron said. "But then everyone stopped coming over because they know how my mom is." It's after 6 p.m. and Anthony and Tiffany are heading back home in the dark. They are talking about how they both learned who their true friends were, after their brush with the law. "You find out who your friends are real quick," Anthony says. "You turn around and your friends ain't there. Your friends will be the first to flip on you." Tiffany's mother, Cheryl Giuliano, comes home around 5:30 but soon leaves for her second job. The pool-hopping incident resulted in a $57 fine, 20 hours of community service and probation for Tiffany. "When I come home, I usually touch base with her," Giuliano says. "I see if she's done her homework or she calls me and checks in." Giuliano says she isn't surprised to learn of Tiffany's after-school adventures. "I knew she would experiment because of certain life choices her father and I made," Giuliano says. "But I'm trusting that if she experimented having seen others' choices and where that went that she would not follow." Tiffany's mother says she is hopeful. By the end of the year, she hopes her job will start to stabilize and she can spend more time at home with Tiffany. The two have begun attending church regularly, too, and Tiffany has a new goal, to attend cosmetology school. She can't wait to start Redlands High School next fall because it offers a vocational program for cosmetology. "She knows she's got to get her grades up to be in that program," Giuliano says. "We're putting together a desk for her now, so she can do her homework there." Anthony, whose charm and ready smile make him look like a toothpaste advertisement, admits he wants some boundaries in his life. Mow that he lives with his grandparents after a recent stint in the juvenile court system, he has that now. He knows his grandparents will not only set rules for him but that there will be consequences if they are broken basically, he is risking his freedom. Although he hates to be disciplined, he says he knows he needs it. "I kind of want them to," he says. "If I start slipping and going off on the wrong way, I kind of do. "My grandpa keeps me in check." Anthony Roque, 15, and 13-year-old Tiffany Giuliano-Rodgers, say there are three major signs for parents to watch out for if they suspect their child is engaging in risky behavior. Mood swings. Change in attitude. Depression. Tiffany and Anthony also suggested ways for parents to keep lines of communication open with their children and to keep them safe. Keep an eye on them. Watch who they hang out with and where they go, Anthony said. ``Don't be afraid to walk up to a car and meet the people your kid is going with,'' he said. Show some trust. Don't accuse them of anything without some proof, Tiffany said. Be reasonable. ``If you're too strict, it pushes them to rebel,'' Anthony said. ``If you try to keep your daughter away from her boyfriend, she's going to find a way to see him, no matter what.'' Talk to them. ``Talk to them about everything,'' Anthony said. ``Find out why they are doing the things they do. If you are open with them, it will make a bond that no one can break.'' - --- MAP posted-by: Larry Seguin