Pubdate: Mon, 28 Feb 2005
Source: North Thompson Star/Journal (CN BC)
Copyright: 2005 The North Thompson Star/Journal
Contact:  http://www.starjournal.net/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1231
Author: A caring mom and dad Barriere, BC
Referenced: http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v05/n256/a02.html?14516

SHOULD WE NOT LOOK AT OURSELVES IN A MIRROR?

To the Editor:

Since reading the article Feb. 7/05 Heartbroken Barriere Mom Speaks Out, I 
have had the privilege of meeting the brave young lady of 16 years of who 
the story is about who has taken the biggest step to recovery. She has 
willingly picked up a mirror and looked at herself.

She now realizes that there are many concerned and caring people out there 
who have let her know that she has their support.

It disturbs me to have discovered that she has been shunned and avoided by 
some community members - people who don't want to be seen associating with 
her in public places.

Don't be embarrassed to be seen with a troubled person, rather see yourself 
as someone who is objective, not judgmental. We need to be very mindful 
that good people can make bad choices but that hardly gives us the right to 
label that person as a whole to be bad.

It tore at my heart to imagine this girl extending a smile to someone who 
reacted by turning his or her back on her. Perhaps we would all do well to 
pick up our own mirrors.

I also have a child that is struggling with drug issues, and chances are if 
all the parents of children using drugs came forth we'd likely fill the 
Star/Journal with our stories.

Sadly though I myself have met several parents who are aware and either 
gave the child permission to do it or they turn a blind eye.

I would like to say to these parents that you may think it's just a 
temporary phase that he or she will grow out of, or perhaps your child has 
convinced you that they aren't using anything other than marijuana. Telling 
yourself that's the extent of your childs drug use may well be denial.

Children may believe they will be seen as failures and would rather keep 
quiet for fear of disappointing a parent. One of the biggest problems is 
that some teens feel they are capable of making wise decisions and are 
grown up enough to take care of themselves. My son and his friends claim 
that smoking pot is equivalent to getting a prescription from a physician 
for anxiety and stress. I'm sure they also have similar comparisons to 
using other illegal substance. Basically they feel that using drugs is 
completely harmless!

A student may also lose the opportunity to enroll or participate in school 
programs if they are known to be using narcotics. Is punishing them the 
right way to help them?

Are we naive enough to think this policy will convince them to quit?

By taking away the opportunity to participate in constructive activities we 
are actually driving them deeper into the bad habits we want them to quit.

The more we take away, the more idle time they have to waist themselves 
away. There is a need for frequent and ongoing communication between our 
schools and parents of the child who is struggling. This can't be stressed 
enough. We as parents can't be of assistance if we are not informed. It's 
important to address the child who may just be discovering the world of 
drugs in order to prevent them from becoming a serious addict that faces a 
long road to recovery.

A caring mom and dad Barriere, BC
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MAP posted-by: Jay Bergstrom