Pubdate: Wed, 28 Dec 2005
Source: Long Beach Press-Telegram (CA)
Copyright: 2005 Los Angeles Newspaper Group
Contact:  http://www.ptconnect.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/244
Author: Douglas  Brown, The Denver Post
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/pot.htm (Cannabis)
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/decrim.htm (Decrim/Legalization)
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/women.htm (Women)

MOMS USE POT TO RELAX

DENVER -- They carpool, read bedtime stories, and when they're away 
from the kids, these Denver moms sometimes retrieve the hidden 
baggie, pack a pipe or roll a joint, and smoke a little weed.

"It slows me down," says a 40-something mother of a 10-year-old 
daughter. "It's a nice, relaxing, low-key thing."

One Denver psychologist, the 46-year-old mother of a young child, 
smokes because it helps her find "that space that is so about me and 
not about being a parent."

"It helps you stop thinking," says a 37-year-old mother of two, a 
mildly conservative Republican who, like most of the women 
interviewed, smokes once or twice a week. "I either can't sleep at 
night because I'm restless, or I can't get in the mood with my 
husband because my mind is spinning."

It wasn't just the stereotypical pot smoker the 22-year-old 
skateboarding slacker who measures his days in bong hits who was 
among the 58,866 Denver residents who voted in November to pass the 
Alcohol-Marijuana Equalization Initiative.

These marijuana-loving mamas helped make Denver the first city to 
legalize small amounts of pot for private adult use. Under state and 
federal law, however, possession of marijuana remains illegal.

Among other things, the vote "shows just how many pot smokers there 
are in this city," says a 37-year-old publicist, the mother of two 
young children.

The moms trumpet pot as a safe, healthy alternative to alcohol. 
Marijuana critics say they're fooling themselves.

"They are sending those kids a message that it's OK to get high, and 
they intend to send that message," says Dr. Mary Holley of Mothers 
Against Meth-Amphetamine. The physician works to organize mothers 
against all illegal drugs. "That's an extremely destructive message." 
Through their habits, the moms tell their kids that "if he has a 
problem, he can just go out and get high."

Pot is not harmless, says Christian Hopfer, a psychiatry professor at 
the University of Colorado.

Smoking pot can cause lung cancer, he says, and lead to addiction.

The moms say they smoked grass more frequently when they were 
younger. Now, most of them puff away occasionally at a party or at 
home on a Saturday night.

Many people are capable of smoking pot the same way many drink booze 
in small doses, in certain settings and not to excess, says Hopfer.

But just as alcohol breeds desperate alcoholics, those who smoke pot 
range from sporadic users to addicts. With both substances, Hopfer 
says, some users are capable of indulging without unraveling their lives.

The Denver publicist says she gets "very introspective and very 
thoughtful" when she smokes from her pipe.

"You smoke some weed, you are laughing," she says. "It brings me back 
to the times when I was so much more carefree. I'd much rather do 
that than sit in a smoky bar and drink liquor with my friends."

The Washington Park mother says she doesn't know anybody in her age 
bracket with children who doesn't smoke pot. In fact, she says, "I 
know very few people who don't" smoke marijuana, including chief 
executives and lawyers.

Another mother says she sometimes goes to parties "with moms and pot 
brownies. There are baby-sitters for the kids. It's OK to laugh and 
carry on with your girlfriends."

At the parties one mother attends, full of middle-aged professional 
parents, a pot contingent usually

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in the house, if not all over the place.

Many of the moms have not disclosed their grass-inhaling secrets to 
their kids. The kids are too young, they say, and might not absorb 
the main message the moms want to send when they do get around to 
some frank talking: that smoking marijuana is for adults.

Young brains, the moms say, can't handle marijuana. Like sex and 
alcohol, the decision about whether to take a toke should be reserved 
for people with proper seasoning: old enough to vote, finished with 
high school, stepping into adulthood.

A 36-year-old, laid-off information technology professional wants her 
12-year-old daughter to wait until she's 25 to even think about smoking pot.

But that hasn't stopped the north Denver mom from inhaling in front 
of the girl. She first got stoned around her daughter when the girl 
was 9 at the Burning Man festival in the Nevada desert, an annual 
bacchanal that attracts thousands of artists, oddballs and thrill-seekers.

"I don't really care because it's her decision," says the woman's 
daughter, sitting on a couch, knitting, in her home.

The girl says she has no interest in trying the drug herself, in part 
because, "I'm not supposed to."

Her mom says she has been routinely smoking pot since she turned 19. 
Her own father, she says, gave her an ounce of pot for Christmas; he 
had quit smoking the stuff and thought she would like it.

"I think it was a bad decision on his part," she says.

Still, she loves her weed.

Pot, she says, is "a part of who I am. It's fun. It's a way to 
connect. It's like having a beer with someone. It's less harmful than 
alcohol, it's not fattening, it's ultimately cheaper. Alcohol is so 
bad for your body."

If her daughter ever chooses to try a mind-altering drug, the mom 
hopes she elects marijuana over alcohol, a sentiment echoed by the other moms.

"I'd much rather have her smoke pot than drink because she'll be much 
less likely to get into bad situations," says the mother, who does a 
lot of smoking with her husband while in their outdoor hot tub.

As the pot-smoking moms' kids get older, how and when do the moms 
plan to broach the subject of their weaknesses for weed?

"That's going to be a hard one," says the psychologist. "I hope what 
I'll do is not lie, but talk about safety and age. I'm sorry that I 
started (smoking) so early (she took her first puff in seventh 
grade). I think I missed some important developmental stages."

None of the moms is too bothered by the specter of the police. While 
they all understand that smoking grass remains illegal in Denver, 
they also agree that the vote on Initiative 100 illustrates Denver's 
laissez-faire attitude toward weed.

"Now that it's passed," says one mom, "I'm more comfortable talking about it."
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MAP posted-by: Beth Wehrman