Pubdate: Mon, 02 Jan 2006
Source: Dover-Sherborn Press (Framingham, MA)
Copyright: 2006 Dover-Sherborn Press
Contact:  http://www2.townonline.com/dover/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/3586
Author: Bev Wax, Correspondent
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/youth.htm (Youth)

MAKE SURE YOUR KIDS NOT CRUISIN' FOR BOOZIN'

Without realizing it, adults are selling alcohol to young children by 
glamorizing its use.

That was the  message sent loud and clear to parents of 
Dover-Sherborn students in  kindergarten through eighth grade last 
Tuesday evening in the Mudge Auditorium.

Renee Soulis from  Freedom from Chemical Dependency was the featured 
speaker. The presentation was  a joint effort of the Substance Abuse 
Roundtable at the Dover-Sherborn High  School and ReachOut, a 
community based human services organization.

Soulis began by  saying that by the time children reach high school, 
many parents feel it is too  late to change their children's 
attitudes about underage drinking. She stressed  education about 
alcohol should begin in elementary school. "Early is a good  thing," 
Soulis said.

She reassured the  audience that her intention was not to judge 
parents' habits, and that every  family makes its own personal 
decision on alcohol. She said it would  be very difficult to get the 
audience to all agree. "If we want children to  drink, at what age, 
and under what circumstances ... we all will disagree what  age is 
appropriate to have a drink because right here there in this room 
there  are all different backgrounds and a vast array of attitudes 
around alcohol," she  said.

Using the concept  of anticipatory socialization, Soulis explained 
the further away children are  from a certain grade, the more likely 
they will exaggerate that grade's  behavior. Thus, a kindergartener 
may think all teenagers drink. Fact vs. perceptions She reviewed 
statistics showing that 33 percent of the U.S. population doesn't 
drink at all,  and only 10 percent of adults drink 90 percent of the 
booze. "Using these can  reduce false perceptions," Soulis said. On 
the other hand, she also believes,  "Every time we mention that 
college drinking is out of control, we are telling  our kids to drink."

She said the  earlier a child starts to use alcohol or drugs, the 
greater the chance of their  becoming a substance abuser. Soulis 
said, "Before 15, the risk of getting into  trouble increases tenfold."

She described her  shock at going into an elementary classroom years 
ago and asking the students  what they drank at lunch and receiving 
typical answers such as chocolate milk  and apple juice. When asked 
what adults drank and expecting answers like coffee  and tea, Soulis 
instead heard gin-and-tonics, wine and even names of specific  Mexican beers.

On further  questioning, the children, many said they believed adults 
drink "as soon as they  take their coat off," "after a hard day at 
work" and "to have fun at  parties."

Again, saying the  choice to drink is a personal decision, she 
suggested parents think about how  alcohol is portrayed in a home in 
the eyes of a child. She asked the audience  questions: "Do they 
connect stress relief and anxiety to drinking? Where is the  alcohol 
kept? Is a wet bar a sort of shrine?" Show early Soulis offered 
parents concrete suggestions, such as showing our children we can 
have fun  without alcohol and delaying drinking for as long as 
possible. If a child asks  for a sip of an alcoholic drink, she said 
it is natural curiosity. Whether or  not a parent decides to grant 
permission, a parent must always have the  conversation that alcohol 
is not good for young, growing bodies. "You don't give  them the 
taste without the conversation that goes with it," she said, 
and  suggested they taste something like tequila, not something 
palatable. As for families  with teenagers, she brought up a common 
misperception that many families are  serving alcohol to teenagers at 
parties. This is actually a very small  percentage. Heavy teen 
drinkers believe they are in the majority, but in reality  are in the minority.

A  question-and-answer period followed. Many parents agreed it is 
their responsibility to stop and respond to any overheard 
conversation concerning inappropriate behavior.

Otherwise  children and teenagers assume approval. One parent, Amy 
DiSanto, also suggested,  "Most parents remain silent and cross their 
fingers. We must also show our  approval" for good behavior and "use 
positive reinforcement with our  children."

Parents are  invited to Substance Abuse Roundtable meetings held five 
times a year. Joanne Kenney,  director of the Guidance Department, 
said, "It is a great way to voice opinions  and consists of students, 
parents and faculty." To sign up for  the next meeting, parents 
should contact Kenney at the high school or Jane Biagi  of ReachOut,  ---
MAP posted-by: Beth Wehrman