Pubdate: Fri, 03 Feb 2006
Source: Northern Advocate (New Zealand)
Copyright: 2006 Northern Advocate
Contact: http://www.northernadvocate.co.nz/info/letters/
Website: http://www.northernadvocate.co.nz
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/2929
Author: Tim Eves
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/testing.htm (Drug Testing)
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/pot.htm (Cannabis)

DRUGS POLICY ... SHOT IN ARM FOR CLUBS OR JUST DOPEY?

OBVIOUSLY, those in charge at World Anti-Doping Authority (WADA) 
headquarters haven't had the privilege of being offered a ticket to 
the raffle at a club sports match in the Far North.

Not the one yours truly was asked to buy, quite some time ago you understand.

Let's just say the prize for the $2 ticket wasn't a meat pack, 
weighed about an ounce, and could easily be on-sold for about 200 
times that amount by sitting outside a nightclub in the early hours 
of a Saturday morning using half a roll of tin foil and some 
imagination. It certainly made for an interesting topic of 
conversation on the bus trip home, particularly considering half of 
my teammates were policemen. Had a WADA official been on hand with 
about 30 urine testing bottles, however, it is likely several almost 
talented sportspeople would have been forced to employ lawyers, and 
probably seek new employment.

Especially if it happened today, now that WADA has added marijuana to 
its list of drugs that sportspeople need to avoid like the plague or 
risk being pilloried, banned, stood down, fined, shamed and most 
probably sacked.

What's intriguing, however, is not just why WADA bigwigs think any 
sportsperson worth their salt would be capable of performing with any 
level of distinction after a hard night on the happy weed, but how 
they might identify likely suspects.

Maybe if, in the midst of a heated battle, the winger is spotted 
having a protracted conversation with the corner flag about the 
texture of pineapple lumps, it might be obvious there is a problem.

Other than that, one doubts if an extensive testing programme would 
reveal much at all.

What WADA might be succeeding in doing is convincing the general 
population that consumes several thousand tonnes of the stuff in a 
calendar year, that life as a professional sportsperson has it drawbacks.

As it stands, professional sportspeople rarely drink, so rarely in 
fact that when they do they end up so legless that they end up in 
headlines, and occasionally court, for the next week.

They can't take party drugs, wind up the bass on the stereos and 
dance like a headless chicken at some nondescript nightclub until 
dawn, because even the "organic" versions of these pills have 
chemicals that nobody can spell that are inevitably banned as well.

And heaven help them if they get the 'flu. Apart from meditating, 
waving crystals over their forehead and chewing on a formula made 
from the bark of a tree you only find in the rain forests of Borneo, 
they can't even consider taking an aspirin for that headache.

What would be interesting is if WADA somehow convinced every sports 
body in provincial New Zealand (well come to think of it every sports 
body in Aotearoa) to follow the lead of the Australian National Rugby 
League (NRL) and adopt a controversial drug policy where players 
testing positive to cannabis will be banned for up to two years.

NRL officials said the code's governing body in Australia would 
impose a 12-month suspension if drug tests revealed marijuana and 
repeat offenders will be banished for two years.

This might explain Northland's somewhat sporadic ability to achieve 
on the national stage but, if this policy was adopted and forced to 
the letter here, at a guess we would only be celebrating any sporting 
successes on a two-yearly cycle.

In between times there would be a strange, peaceful, spaced-out lull 
as sportspeople served out their bans.

Come to think of it, bring on WADA. It might be just what our 
province needs to shake up the sports scene.
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MAP posted-by: Jay Bergstrom