Pubdate: Wed, 03 Oct 2007 Source: Gisborne Herald (New Zealand) Copyright: 2007 The Gisborne Herald Co. Ltd Contact: http://www.gisborneherald.co.nz/home.htm Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/924 Author: Iain Gillies KIWI PARENTS RIGHT UP WITH THE BEST DESPITE THE GENERATION GAP Bringing up children is a subject we hear more about than ever. Why? Because the world around us is changing fast. Our front page story on Saturday expressing the concern of medical sources, police and others about the damage being done by cannabis use was disturbing. Bringing up children these days is not always easy. And probably the thing most Kiwi parents are wondering about is how their children are coping with the everyday hassle of growing up. We make this point because of the many parents who have expressed worry about parenting problems in general. Cannabis is a worry, so, too, is binge drinking. And there are new traps on the streets, addiction to computer games, the internet and all manner of distractions. Some fear these factors are cutting us off from our kids. And there is no doubt that technology has moved so far and so fast that we're not aware of what they're watching on television, the video games they're playing or the internet sites they access. We're in an age of information saturation on everything from cooking to raising a child. We're inclined to believe that if we follow the recipe everything will turn out fine. Sometimes it's better to just follow your instincts. We worry about our kids becoming problem children because they have a tantrum. But children act childishly sometimes and that's OK. Why should they behave perfectly all the time? And another thing . . . don't scream back at the kids. Try to keep calm at all times. Remember, too . . . you can't put any parental technique into practice until you've made sure your own attitude is right. One of the problems is that sometimes we are competitive parents and project our wishes onto our children. They shouldn't become status symbols, a measure of success like our house or car. And stop stressing about perfection. If we keep love and respect at the heart of our relationship with our children, we won't go far wrong. We believe Kiwi parents are right up with the best. - --- MAP posted-by: Derek