Pubdate: Mon, 15 Oct 2007 Source: Expositor, The (CN ON) Copyright: 2007 The Brantford Expositor Contact: http://www.brantfordexpositor.ca/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1130 Author: Vincent Ball 'I WASN'T ARRESTED, I WAS RESCUED' Pauline Beaulne has something to say to the police officers who raided her home and busted her for drug trafficking - thanks. "They busted into my home... and charged me with several counts of trafficking," Beaulne, 40, says. "I spent a couple of days in jail and, when I was there, I prayed to God that if I could ever get out of this mess I'd never go back to using again." That was in February. Now, more than eight months later, Beaulne is still clean and determined not to go back to the life of a crack-cocaine user. And she believes she has the Brantford police street crimes unit to thank for it. "I don't know that I would have said this then, when they arrested me. But now, I look at it and think, 'That wasn't a bust, that was a blessing,' " Beaulne says. "I wasn't arrested, I was rescued and I want to thank them for doing it." During the raid, police confiscated $2,000 worth of cocaine, a large quantity of cash and arrested one other person, a 45-year-old man. When Beaulne came before the courts, she pleaded guilty to two counts of trafficking and received eight months of house arrest and two years' probation. It was the first time she had been arrested, and she had already started taking steps toward sobriety. "Judge (Ken) Lenz made it clear. If I get arrested again, the sentence will go up, not down." Born and raised in Brantford, Beaulne has two children. Prior to her arrest, she had been using cocaine and crack on and off for about four years. She has been through a couple of rehabilitation programs and has had extended periods of being drug free. But it's a tough addiction to beat and in the past, she had gone back to using drugs. "I was always able to get it through a boyfriend," Beaulne says. "I never had to steal, sell my body or get down on my knees to get it." This time she is determined to stay clean and has a lot of support. "I've changed the people, the places and the things" in my life, Beaulne says. "I see my kids and my daughter-in-law and they tell me they love me. "I always say, 'It was my choice to use and my choice not to use.' I'm choosing not to use." She is working with an addictions counsellor and attends group therapy sessions. She also has a sponsor whom she can call at any time for support. Beaulne also reads a great deal and thinks a lot about her choices, making changes and colours. "I always think of the colour green and when I look outward I see trees, bushes and grass. I don't see a cloud of smoke anymore." Beaulne is also trying to create a new future for herself, one that includes completing her education, with the goal of becoming an addictions counsellor. "I love my life right now. But I always take it one day at a time, and today I am well." - ----------------------------------- Expositor reporter Vincent Ball spent a week with the Brantford Police street crimes unit to produce a special series - Undercover, an inside look at Brantford's drug trade. The three-part series concludes today. - --- MAP posted-by: Beth Wehrman