Pubdate: Mon, 09 Apr 2007
Source: Reno Gazette-Journal (NV)
Webpage:
Copyright: 2007 Reno Gazette-Journal
Contact: http://www.rgj.com/helpdesk/news/letter_to_editor.php
Website: http://www.rgj.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/363
Author: Jaclyn O'Malley

MENTOR PROGRAM HELPS DRUG-ADDICTED MOMS

A new program launched in January aims to convince drug-abusing
mothers to get help for their addictions before they permanently lose
their parental rights.

The Mentor Moms program pairs former drug addicts who almost lost
their children with other abusers facing the same ordeal. The mentors
use their experiences, insight and success at kicking their own habits
and getting their children back to motivate other women to do the same.

So far, about a dozen women have been referred for services through
the program. Many others attend orientation meetings to get help.

The Mentor Moms -- Sheena Wolfe, Crystal Merritt and Tina Olvera --
had their children returned to them once they straightened out their
lives.

Program supervisor Liz Donahoe, of the Sparks nonprofit Tru Vista 
that advocates for people
in the court system, said the mentors will help motivate other women
to get on track.

She said they also offer tips on how the system works, what to expect
and how to interact with social workers.

They also will encourage them to not give up.

"People don't understand when they use and abuse drugs and alcohol,
they are hurting themselves and majorly hurting their children," said
Olvera, a mother of four. "Children are innocent and it's not fair to
be born into that lifestyle.

"I fought to get my kids back," she said. "But I knew I needed to
change. My biggest obstacle was taking that first step forward."

Basically, the mentors will help substance-abusing mothers navigate
smoothly through the social services and legal systems, Donahoe said.
The Mentor Moms attend probable cause hearings at Washoe District
Family Court, where they try to encourage the women to get involved in
the county's drug court and seek treatment. Those hearings occur after
a child has been removed from a parent's custody on allegations of
abuse and neglect.

Most of the women the Mentor Moms encounter are addicted to
methamphetamine, Donahoe said, which mirrors most of the county's drug
court participants. Because of the addictive hold of meth, it takes
addicts longer to kick the drug. Officials said it is proven that the
earlier a meth addict can go into treatment, the better chance they
have of maintaining sobriety.

Washoe County social workers said that more parents are losing their
parental rights due to meth addiction and the extended time it takes
to get clean because of repeated relapses. But they also said there is
hope for those who realize their children are more important than the
drug.

"It would have been easier for me if I had the opportunity to talk to
someone who went through it," said Wolfe, a recovered alcoholic whose
9-year-old daughter alerted authorities to her mother's addiction.

"You see someone who has done it, and you think, 'Ah, there is light
at the end of the tunnel. I can get my kids back. They aren't lost
forever.' "

When her child was removed, Wolfe said she was angry and resentful at
authorities.

"Now that I look back, that was the best thing for me. So was drug
court," she said. "At first, you see all the officials, and it's like
you're all alone and they're all against you."

Wolfe, who had no prior experience with the legal system, said she was
spooked just walking through the front door of the courthouse.

"We want to tell women that we were where they are, and now, we are on
the other side," she said. "There is a happy ending."

Merritt, who has three children, said that within the first 90 days
after a child is removed, a parent will be assigned a social worker.
But she warned that proceedings will appear to move slowly.

"The first 90 days are good for parents to work on themselves even
though they think they are away from their kids too long," Merritt
said. "That is the time to start making new changes."

Olvera, off meth more than six years, takes care of four children,
including one cancer-stricken 9-year-old who lost a kidney. She is the
general manager of a Reno employment agency and goes to school.

"Some think they can't do it," Olvera said. "The littlest obstacle and
they give up. I want them to know they can do it."

But, the women know they will not be able to help everyone.

"It's so important when we hear parents say they will do anything they
can to get their children back," Merritt said. "Then we at least know
they are a good candidate."

Wolfe said some parents just aren't ready to quit.

"No one can make you quit until you want to," she said.

Part of what makes getting sober so difficult for addicts is that it
means facing a new way of life, the women said. Donahoe added that
it's hard for addicts to ask for help.

"Some are just scared because they've lived the drug life for so
long," Merritt said. "They have to learn to live all over again. They
have to learn to sleep, to work, to eat. And then they have to learn
how to be parents.

"Your whole world changes," she said.
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