Pubdate: Wed, 23 Apr 2008 Source: Vancouver Courier (CN BC) Copyright: 2008 Vancouver Courier Contact: http://www.vancourier.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/474 Author: Sandra Thomas HIGH SOCIETY In a city obsessed with the problems of street drugs, white collar drug addicts slip under the radar--at great cost to themselves and their families Gary remembers the day he hit rock bottom. "The lowest point for me was the day I woke up in my car on the side of the highway at UBC and couldn't remember how I got there," he recalls. "The sun was coming up and I was supposed to be at work. I'd had a dream about my [deceased] dad while I was sleeping and he was slapping me in the face. I looked in the [rear-view] mirror and had one of those dramatic movie moments. That was when I called my mom, my brother and my sister-in-law and said, 'I need help.'" Gary, a rising young executive, initially regarded that moment as one of the worst of his life, but now considers it the wake-up call that saved his life. A recovering alcoholic and cocaine user, Gary has been clean and sober since that day, July 17, 2006. The Courier agreed not to use Gary's last name at his request, which was in keeping with his commitment to the code of Alcoholics Anonymous. In exchange, the 33-year-old Vancouver resident agreed to share his story. In a city obsessed with the alcohol and drug addiction problems plaguing the Downtown Eastside and other neighbourhoods, it's easy for white-collar addicts like Gary to slip under the radar. On the surface, people like Gary seem to have won life's lottery: they're successful, well-paid, popular and happy. But drug and alcohol addiction in this city goes far beyond the corner of Main and Hastings and can be found in the professional world of doctors, dentists, nurses, lawyers, pilots, veterinarians, business owners and executives working in banking and finance. Drugs are remarkably easy to find in their social circles, and they have the money to buy them. Some like Gary find their way into treatment, often thanks to understanding and compassion from their employers, friends and family. And those like Gary who succeed hope that others in their situation will do the same. Gary was an ambitious financial executive in his late 20s, in corporate training, education and development, when he began his spiral into drug and alcohol abuse. He'd been a social drinker for years, but in 2005 after receiving a promotion at work and the raise that went along with it, he ramped the partying up. Gary's story could be lifted straight from the script of the 1980s movie Bright Lights, Big City, in which Michael J. Fox plays a young talented executive swept up in the party life that so often accompanies the professional rise of successful men and women. As in the movie, alcohol and cocaine quickly became Gary's drugs of choice. Gary, who first tried cocaine New Year's Eve, 2001, began as a recreational user who kept his drug-taking to the occasional weekend. "I was sort of the party guy with my friends and family and things were good for awhile," Gary explains. "But I think it was when cocaine got in the picture that things started to deteriorate pretty fast. Pretty soon things were out of control." Gary began avoiding family and close friends and hung around with a group of other successful young professionals with whom partying was a priority. He had three groups of friends. After work, he enjoyed civilized after-work cocktails, but when they headed home he'd join a second crew of friends willing to party until midnight on a work night. Once Gary said goodnight to that gang, he'd catch up with his midnight shift, whose venue of choice was a now-defunct restaurant on Granville Street that fronted for an after-hours bar. "I'd stay out drinking until four or five in the morning, five and six days in a row," he says. "It got to the point I'd know I was going to stay out all night and I'd bring a change of clothes for work." The office where Gary works has a gym, and he'd slip into the shower after a night of partying, change his clothes and begin his work day, often without sleeping. "I reached the point where my sole purpose of the day was not to pass out," he says. "Looking back you try and make sense of why this happened, and ask, 'Why me?' I never planned on this happening. I have a totally great family and I never had any financial difficulties." He reached the point where he drank most weeknights and used large amounts of cocaine on the weekends. He took cash advances from his credit cards to pay for his habits and soon found himself in serious debt. Initially a gram of cocaine would last Gary a week, but eventually he started snorting up to a $100 "eight ball" [3.5 grams] of cocaine in a day. Gary never had to buy drugs off the street because as a young professional he knew enough other young professionals so that a drug source was no further than a phone call away. He says the owner of the restaurant was also good for hooking the party gang up with coke on request. During these binges it was easy for Gary to believe he'd be best friends forever with his newfound buddies. One of them would wait until his wife fell asleep before sneaking out of the house to join his party pals. "While we were partying we'd come up with great ideas for the world," he says. "But then I couldn't remember what they were the next day. I had replaced all of my really good friends with people who were always on the scene. I was embarrassed, I didn't think they'd understand." Gary's performance on the job slipped and he missed several important deadlines. He also began calling in sick to work. On one of those occasions he spent the day alone drinking a bottle of tequila at a friend's place. Then Gary suffered blackouts. Near the end of his drinking days Gary would find himself at a party with no clue how he got there. More disturbingly, when he'd leave the party he often found his car parked outside but had no memory of having driven it there. And that's exactly what happened the morning Gary woke up on the side of the road by UBC. He says he doesn't have to be reminded how lucky he was that he didn't kill himself or someone else. The shame and guilt he felt was the main reason it took him so long to ask for help. The idea of confessing digressions to mothers, fathers, siblings or close friends keeps many addicts in the closet. But Gary says he's proof addicts can get past the shame with help and get their lives back on track. Gary found the help he needed at the Orchard Recovery and Treatment Centre on Bowen Island, one of several residential treatment programs in B.C. where white-collar addicts from around the world head in search of help. Gary decided on the private, for-profit centre after researching treatment options online. He was reluctant to participate in other Vancouver-based programs because he assumed they'd be full of street people similar to the ones he'd seen on the Downtown Eastside. "That was a whole other bottom I didn't see myself as hitting," he says. "I just pictured people living on the street using heroin. I couldn't relate to that at all." Once Gary decided to seek help he went to his supervisor at work to tell him the truth about his poor performance of late. "He's known me since I started," says Gary. "I went to him and said, 'You know I've been calling in sick a lot, well I'm going to have to call in sick one big time again.'" Gary credits his supervisor for showing great concern and for agreeing to keep their conversation confidential. By then Gary had quit drinking and joined AA. "He told me to take as much time as I needed with no questions asked and got the [insurance] paper work going," says Gary. Gary's employer offered private insurance, which helped with the $12,700 cost of his 28-day stay at Orchard. Many white-collar companies have employee assistance plans for executives that will cover all or part of the cost of treatment. Some plans loan employees the cost of treatment. There are more than 50 for-profit and non-profit recovery and treatment programs available in B.C., but not all have stand-alone centres or offer residential care programs. Arriving by ferry to Bowen Island from the mainland, it's easy to imagine the conflict an executive, used to controlling his or her own destiny, must feel upon arrival at Snug Cove. Gary recalls feeling "really scared." The short drive to Orchard is gorgeous, along a winding road cut through towering trees. The property has West Coast spa feel to it, albeit with a six-foot cedar fence surrounding the administration building and some of the meeting areas. A large gym is located outside the enclosure to the left near a second meeting room. Outside one of the meeting rooms near the main office a group of men sit talking, smoking and laughing. Orchard owner and executive director Lorinda Strang says the ratio of male to female clients at the centre is almost even, with a slight lean towards men. The administrative and meeting areas are treated almost like a campus or workplace, with sleeping areas and a dining room a short drive or walk away. The centre accommodates a maximum of 25 clients, for either 28 or 42-day residential care programs, which typically are full or near capacity. Strang says executives find asking for help extremely difficult--they're used to being in control. By the time a type-A executive, doctor or business owner seeks help, says Strang, it's likely their addiction is out of control. "They're also not used to anyone saying no to them," she says. "The bottom line is the hardest thing they can do is ask for help and admit they can't do it on their own." Strang, a serious-looking blond but with a quick smile, fought her own battle with alcohol before getting sober 18 years ago. She opened the Orchard in 2002 with her husband at the time, but now runs the centre on her own. They opened Orchard, she explains, because most similar private treatment centres were based in the U.S. and cost from $25,000 to $30,000 per stay. Adding in the cost of travel makes the cost often prohibitive for both the addict and family. When Orchard first opened, says Strang, many of its clients were American. But with the dollar at par, and strict passport rules for international flights, those numbers have dropped. Instead the centre sees a steady stream of Canadians, as well as clients from as far away as Australia, Africa and Saudi Arabia. Strang says the old saying about the necessity of reaching rock bottom before asking for help with addictions isn't the rule. Just because a person isn't drinking in the morning, keeping liquor in their desk at work or buying drugs on their lunch break doesn't mean they don't have a problem, she says. "We tell people the elevator doesn't have to go all the way to the bottom. They can get off at any floor. Sometimes they just have to be sick and tired of being sick and tired. That's the time to get help, before there are irreversible consequences." Those consequences can be anything from losing a marriage or job, to accumulating heavy debt to permanent physical damage such as "wet brain," a chronic brain syndrome caused by long-term alcoholism, with symptoms similar to dementia such as confusion, memory loss and disorientation, as well as drowsiness, paralysis of eye movement and a staggering walk. "A lot of clients we see are just holding on by a thread," says Strang. "They still have a job, a home and a family, but just barely. Addiction holds you hostage and steals your life." Strang says even if all of those losses have already taken place, there's still hope. "There's always hope," she reiterates. "Sometimes you need to lose something before you seek help and sometimes you don't." Because many white-collar addicts are still very high functioning, they can convince themselves there's no problem, she adds. "They still have a job, they still have a family, they work out every day and run marathons," she says. "Many of these [white-collar] addicts are over achievers, that's what they do. But there's always payback." Clients arriving at Orchard are addicted to everything from alcohol, cocaine, crystal meth and heroin, to an array of prescription drugs including Percodan, oxycodone and Demerol. The staff at Orchard can assist in arranging detox treatments if necessary, and can also advise loved ones on how best to arrange an intervention if needed. Strang doesn't watch the reality TV program Intervention, but notes since it began airing the centre has received calls from concerned family members looking for advice after viewing an episode. "We even had a client call after watching the show and he said, 'I wonder why no one cares enough about me to do an intervention,'" says Strang. "The family actually held one the next day." Their time at Orchard includes regular supervision. Clients take part in group and individual counselling sessions. An extended care program following treatment is available to clients who need to live in a protected, sober environment while preparing for life outside the centre. The centre's clinical team includes a medical services director, program director, three counsellors, a spiritual director, yoga and qigong (Chinese breathing and energy exercises) instructors and a personal fitness trainer. Consulting physicians are on call 24 hours. A typical weekday at Orchard begins with breakfast at 7:30 a.m., Qigong from 8:30 to 9 a.m., a seminar from 9:15 to 10:15 a.m., small group sessions from 11:45 to 12:30, lunch, spirituality group from 1:30 to 2:45 p.m., meditation from 3 to 4 p.m., gym or free time from 4 to 5 p.m., dinner from 5 to 6 p.m., an AA or Narcotics Anonymous meeting from 7 to 9 p.m., leisure time or a movie from 9 to 11 p.m. "Lights out" is at 11 p.m. Strang says while many success stories come out of Orchard, not everyone makes it. A wooden archway leading into a memorial garden near the administration building holds several small plaques honouring former clients who've died. A circular wooden bench at the bottom of the garden sits peacefully under a canopy of tree branches. The garden is named after Strang's brother Michael Warren Whitmore, who died of a drug overdose in 1984. An alumni program allows addicts who complete treatment and remain sober after leaving Orchard to keep in touch with staff and other graduates. The last Thursday of the month is Alumni Celebration Day at Orchard, which includes sobriety anniversary celebrations, dinner and an evening meeting based on a 12-step program. Orchard alumni events are held in West Vancouver, Edmonton, Seattle and Calgary. Alumni groups are also launching in Victoria and Toronto. Corporate lawyer John Gulak helps run the alumni program in Calgary. Gulak, a former cocaine addict, gave the Courier permission to use his last name. Like so many other cocaine addicts, Gulak used the drug recreationally at first. That was six years ago when he turned 40, the start of what he calls a minor mid-life crisis. Soon he was using cocaine every night. Gulak, a typical over-achiever, liked the effects. "It made me feel on top of my game," says Gulak. "I was able to multi-task more. Your brain operates at a faster speed and it can make you believe it increases your mental ability. But over the long term you lose the ability to focus and I found that was a problem." Unlike Gary, Gulak wasn't into the party scene and instead used cocaine in isolation. He began avoiding his close friends and family, including his son who lives with his mother. Like a lot of other addicts, Gulak kept the people around him separated so they couldn't compare notes about his behaviour. Many close to him sensed there was a problem, but couldn't put their finger on what was going on. He says a typical trick of executives dealing with addiction is to ensure spouses don't have contact with assistants or secretaries who could help them put the pieces together. Gulak remembers when he had dinner in 2004 with an old high-school friend in Toronto. "He sensed something was not right," says Gulak. "But he thought it was more career related. I presented it as that I was considering a career change, but that wasn't the case." Like Gary, Gulak never had to buy his drugs on the street, and he wonders if that necessity would have slowed his addiction's progression. "It probably would have changed my path if I did," he says. "But I had an arrangement with a guy so I didn't have to hang out in any scary locations. I think that would have deterred me from getting involved if I did." Gulak admits he was spending a small fortune on drugs, but he was well paid and could afford it. "It was absolutely expensive, but it was manageable," he says. As with most addicts, Gulak had a tough time confessing he had a problem and needed help. He believed a lawyer's main role is as a problem solver, and it was hard to admit he had a problem. "Solving other people's problems became my excuse to not deal with my own," says Gulak. "I didn't want to disappoint my family and close friends. I'm the guy who's supposed to make responsible choices and no mistakes." Gulak believed it would be a sign of weakness to ask for help in dealing with his addiction. Like Gary, a huge obstacle to admitting he had a problem was the shame and guilt involved. "At first I felt like I had gotten myself into this mess and I could get myself out of it," says Gulak. "My work environment is full of high-achieving folks who are highly motivated. We have a strong culture of working out problems." But unlike with addicts seen every day on Vancouver's Downtown Eastside, Gary's addiction wasn't visible to the world. It was easy to continue his cocaine habit for more than two years unnoticed. But several key incidents took place that prompted Gulak to ask for help. The first was the death of a younger cousin who died of an overdose of prescription painkillers. Gulak continued to use cocaine for another six months following his cousin's death. The second was a conversation with a concerned friend, who was also his managing partner in their law firm. "We had a chat and he said some people had expressed concern about me," says Gulak. "They thought I wasn't well. He asked me if I wanted to talk about it. It was an expression of concern and wasn't coercive in any way." Those incidents combined with the conversation he had with his high school friend had a huge impact and convinced Gulak to seek help. In late 2004 Gulak spoke with his managing partner again, and with the help of his employee assistance plan, opted for the 28-day program at Orchard. Before heading to Bowen Island Gulak attended a recovery day program offered though the Alberta Alcohol and Drug Abuse Commission. "I wasn't that scared to go to Orchard because I'd already been clean for almost four weeks before I arrived," he says. "That's not typical. A lot of addicts are high when they get off the ferry at Snug Cove." When Gulak arrived at Orchard, he was relieved he no longer had to hold it together for family, friends and co-workers. He likens the controlled conditions at Orchard to summer camp. "I didn't need to make too many decisions," he says. "There was a range of choices of activities, but not too many. They took away my other responsibilities." Gulak spent a lot of time talking while at Orchard, in both private and group counselling sessions. He had no problem sharing his thoughts with a group because he was clean before arriving at Orchard and his head was clearer. He was inspired to see clients who arrived at the centre high on drugs or booze come out of their shell. "But it's not a straight-line progression," he says. "It's fairly common for some people to leave after a couple of days, but they usually come back." Luckily Gulak's call for help had a happy ending. "Actually coming clean was very affirming for me and I can't think of any exception with people who mattered who weren't supportive," he says. "Really, it was a huge relief." Looking back on his story, Gary says anyone considering treatment should not be afraid. "I was so worried that going into treatment would be the end of fun as I knew it," he says. "But honestly, it's been the best time of my life." Between the drinking and unhealthy lifestyle he'd adopted, Gary gained weight and was out of shape. Since getting sober he's become an avid cyclist, runner and martial arts enthusiast. "All the stuff I used to bullshit about when I was drinking, I'm finally doing," he says. "And I've just signed up to write my [law school admission test]. I figured why not, I've been given a second chance at a proper life and I'm going to enjoy every minute of it." - --- MAP posted-by: Derek