Pubdate: Fri, 11 May 2012 Source: Cowichan News Leader (CN BC) Copyright: 2012 Cowichan News Leader Contact: http://www.cowichannewsleader.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1314 Author: Krista Siefken DRUGS AT YOUR DINNER TABLE Start the conversation: Experts say it's a good thing if you are talking about substance abuse with your teens RCMP Corporal Scott Hilderley's drug prevention tip for parents may surprise you in its simplicity. "The best method of drug prevention is a family, sitting around a table, having dinner and talking together," he says. Hilderley should know. A police officer of 26 years, he's spent 14 years working in drug prevention. And Hilderley highlighted the paramount importance of family connection in preventing substance abuse during a a panel event hosted by the Cowichan District Parent Advisory Council on Tuesday evening. Police, parents, counsellors, doctors and educators talked bluntly about the stark reality of teens and drugs and alcohol. North Cowichan/Duncan RCMP Cpl. Kevin Day told the 100 or so parents at the meeting that pot and booze are obviously popular with Cowichan teens. "Alcohol is the number one drug of choice for our youth today, due to the common belief that going out and drinking - and drinking a lot - with their friends is not the wrong thing to do," he said. "It's somewhat of a cultural thing, and they've come to have the belief that it's OK." "Teens drink for one reason, and one reason only: to get drunk," Hilderley agreed. Ecstasy, crack cocaine and heroin are other substances that turn up in Cowichan, but there's also a black market for prescription drugs. "Prescription drugs that come in the form of pills are becoming more commonplace," Day said. "Drugs such as OxyContin go for about 10 or 20 dollars on the street. "OxyContin has been known to be the poor man's heroin." And not a single one of the options out there is good for teens' developing bodies and brains. "I know everyone wants to know, 'What's the worst drug?' - but does it really matter?" Hilderley asked. "If you work with your kids at keeping your relationship strong, it doesn't matter what's out there. If it doesn't get inside the walls of your house or the body of your child, it doesn't matter." "It starts with the parents," agreed Carrie Morris, the central island co-ordinator for VIHA's Discovery Youth and Family Substance Use Services. "We need parents to make a difference here." Panelists said teens use for a variety of reasons, from peer pressure and relaxation to curiosity and boredom. "I've spent 20 years trying to crack this, and have asked a ton of kids that question," Hilderley said. "The truth is they don't really know why they do it." But a strong family relationship can make all the difference. "They're learning everything they need to learn from your actions," Cowichan District Hospital doctor Isabel Rimmer told parents. "That's probably a lot more useful than a whole lot of yakking at them." Sharing stories, though, can send a clear message about the consequences of substance abuse. Rimmer, for example, shared a story about two 14-year-old boys coming into the ER after drinking too much. They had to be put into diapers as they lay side by side in their hospital beds. "For many teenagers, it's so much about how they look, how they appear," she said. "Those kinds of stories show what drugs and alcohol do to you: they make you look disgusting and undignified." Still, Rimmer said horror stories of explicit detail about how drugs impact the body aren't necessarily helpful. "I'm not sure the 'scaring straight' thing works terribly well," she said. Again, the panelists reiterated the most effective method for drug-free teens is maintaining a strong connection with your kids. "Keep your parental responsibilities first and foremost," Hilderley said, cautioning parents about playing the cool-friend-instead-of-a-parent card. "It gets hard. Parenting is hard, hard work." And even then, kids will sometimes make poor decisions. "They're going to make mistakes," School District 79's Ron Nunweiler said. "We don't want them repeating those mistakes. If they are, then we are doing something wrong." Parent Judy Williams pointed out the difference of disapproving of a teen's mistake, and disapproving of him or her. The latter, she said, will likely just lead to further abuse. Tuesday's DPAC meeting at Mount Prevost Middle School will be followed by next week's sex education workshop for students in Grades 4 to 6 and their parents. Body Smart: Child to Teen happens at Mount Prevost at 7 p.m. on May 15. Email for more information. - --- MAP posted-by: Jay Bergstrom