Pubdate: Sun, 24 Aug 2014 Source: Post-Tribune (Merrillville, IN) Copyright: 2014 Post-Tribune Contact: http://drugsense.org/url/DenTBXGM Website: http://posttrib.suntimes.com/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/3349 Author: David Rutter ANTI-DRUG MEATLOAF WILL MAKE US ALL MORE SOBER Once upon a time, I stood in a batter's box and faced a baseball pitcher who threw so hard I could not even see the ball. I just heard it go by. The 1960s were like that, too. I apparently missed the 1960s though I was standing in the batter's box. Missed drug temptation and curiosity, except for Novocain. It's a gap in my life, which probably means I won't be enlisting in the "transformational" anti-drug crusade in Porter County. We appreciate the urgency to spend as much of other people's money as possible and appear to exemplify good motives, even if there is no evidence any of it works. Nonetheless, one of these days I instead will fly to Denver and smoke my first marijuana cigarette. It's a "bucket list" item. My moment won't be "transformational" in the same way "Empower Porter County" is transformational because that outreach organization of Porter County government is trying to stamp out marijuana. Kill it stone dead, so to speak. The ambition, restated triumphantly by the organization, presumes that we all know what we're transforming from and into. The organization's documents about goals and capabilities evoke echoes of Andy Kaufman's famous lip-syncing of Mighty Mouse's "Here I Come to Save The Day" anthem. Empower Porter County is the admission by Porter County politicians that they've done a lousy job stamping out illicit drug use by trying to talk it to death. But a county is never broke as long as it has a checkbook. Of the two-person staff's current, three-year $750,000 annual budget, $450,000 comes from the county commissioners. Valparaiso, Portage and the Porter County Community Foundation each kicked in $75,000. The United Way and Porter Regional Hospital both added $30,000. NIPSCO gave $15,000. Empower Porter County promises it will succeed where others have stumbled because, well, because. What they have for the money so far is an executive director, a staff member and a website. The website is deeply exercised about marijuana, the debate about marijuana, the very idea that marijuana might be legalized in Indiana. Frankly, they're a little freaky about the topic. This apoplectic fixation crashes into history and, I fear, reality. Hate to break the news, but the pot argument seems mostly over. The website notes parenthetically that the organization also is against illicit prescription drugs, which kill 700 or so Hoosiers a year. Meth? Cocaine? Heroin? They're bad, too, but not nearly as worrisome as pot, which kills some brain cells and many bags of Doritos. No mention of tobacco or booze, which are sort-of-bad drugs if you apply the "causes people to be dead" rule. In some ways, Empower Porter County is like those ancient Japanese soldiers who hid in Philippine jungles not knowing the war ended 70 years ago. But as long as there's public money to spend, the war is never over. County commission president John Evans told a reporter, "Eradicating the drug problem is not easy or inexpensive. If this or any other intervention measure saves a life, the cost is justified." Any group that expects to eradicate illicit drugs by spending $750,000 might be accused of imbibing its own hallucinogen. Evans' second point is rhetorical gibberish. Commissioner Laura Blaney told reporters, "our children's lives are at stake ... doing nothing will only cost more tax dollars down the road." This 750 grand looks suspiciously like that "more tax dollars down the road." The county has spent millions on various anti-drug solutions over the decades that have produced nothing but intractable bureaucracies and resume inflation. Porter County always has shown a fondness for quasi-governmental, perpetual motion machines. Maybe it's the thought that counts. But the Empower Porter County website does feature one inspired educational component. Under the headline "Recipe of the Week" and subtitled "First Recipe Dummy" posted on July 24, it announces "Meatloaf." Under ingredients, it lists one. Ground beef. That's one heck of a powerful drug-fighting recipe. As Evans might say, if one empowered meatloaf recipe for $750,000 saves one Porter County teen from Pepto-Bismol addiction, it will be money well spent. As for me, I'll write from Denver and reveal details of my personal Cheech and Chong moment. It will be transformational. - --- MAP posted-by: Jo-D