Source: THE KANSAS CITY STAR Published: March 30, 1997 OPINION; Pg. L3 FAX: KANSAS CITY STAR KANSAS CITY MO 18162344926; GOVERNMENT GETS ITS CUT IN ALCOHOL, TOBACCO SALES by DICK FEAGLER, Scripps Howard News Service Copyright (c) 1997, The Kansas City Star Co. It's big news that one of the major tobacco companies has admitted that cigarettes are addictive, may be lethal and are marketed for minds as young as 14 years old. Who didn't know this? My late grandmother, born in the last century, referred to cigarettes as "coffin nails. " But nobody ever quoted her on the front page. "Are you still on those coffin nails? " she would ask me when, with great savoir faire, I lit a Salem with a sharp flick of the wornout spring of my Ronson. Of course, back then, everybody I knew was on those coffin nails. "Got a light? " was still an acceptable pickup line in an upscale saloon. Cigarettes might eventually kill you, but you'd die looking cool. The drive to look cool is one of the great human drives, like the drive for sex or the drive for air or the drive to control the TV remote control. The large type tells us that a cigarette maker called the Liggett Group Inc. has newsily acknowledged that cigarettes are an addiction. This came as news to an audience of one: Bob Dole. During what is politely called his "campaign," Dole's most memorable utterance was that he didn't know whether cigarettes were addictive. This caused a confidence gap between Dole and the legion of smokers and exsmokers. It is difficult to support a presidential candidate who is nagged with doubts about selfevident matters like the existence of gravity, the shape of the earth or cigarette addiction. "If he hasn't figured that out, what else hasn't he figured out? " was the obvious question. November answered it. The Liggett Group, manufacturers of Chesterfields, broke down and confessed that it targets its advertising to the 14yearold mind. It promised to stop doing this is the future. No great revelation there. Just about any advertisement you see for anything is aimed at a consumer with the intellect of a 14yearold and the mating instinct of a goat. Drink this beer and you'll get women. Wear these panty hose and you'll get men. Drive this allterrain vehicle on a deathdefying safari through the Great Northern parking lot and you'll look cool. If the Liggett Group starts aiming at the mature American mind, its audience will be small enough to allow it to advertise by telegram. Liggett has agreed to put a warning label on its brands stating that smoking is addictive. To smokers, this is a revelation about as riveting as telling residents of the Ohio Valley that floods are wet. The government is heralding this as a triumph, but it is a triumph that doesn't mask the government's underlying ethical dilemma. The underlying ethical dilemma is that the government is a silent partner with the nicotine and alcohol drug kingpins. While loudly waging war on other drugs, the government takes its cut of the proceeds of the two most lethal drugs in America. A hint of the economic philosophy of Colombian drug lords is alive in Columbus and the District of Columbia. An honest warning label on the side of a pack of cigarettes would have to say: "Reminder: Government proceeds from the sale of this deadly and addictive product are used to build major league sports stadiums." Or: "FYI: Cultivation and manufacture of this deathcausing, tragically habitforming substance are subsidized by your tax dollars. Have a nice day." If what comes out of a cigarette came out of a smokestack, the government would shut the factory down. Physicians who prescribe marijuana to dying patients have been threatened with criminal prosecution. Some years ago, the government waged a costly allout war on asbestos. The feds, I discovered recently, have moved in to occupy my kitchen floor. "There's some asbestos under there," said the man who had come to lay some new tile. "The law says we either got to get some men in space suits to come in and rip it out or we got to bury it. " We buried it. But in the war against nicotine and alcohol, the government has dubious moral standing. It is hard to justify being part of the solution and a beneficiary of the problem at the same time. When the government fights the tobacco companies, it wears a boxing glove on one hand and holds the other hand out for a piece of the action. That ain't cool.