Pubdate: Wed, 15 Sep 1999 Source: Deseret News (UT) Copyright: 1999 Deseret News Publishing Corp. Contact: http://www.desnews.com/ Author: Dennis Romboy, Deseret News staff writer METH DIETERS DROP POUNDS BUT LOSE THEIR MINDS, TOO Use Of Drug For Weight Loss May Be Rising Among Utah Women Luann Kahus liked what she saw in the mirror. A tall, slender, raven-haired woman in her early 40s. Nice teeth. Wide smile. A new grandma who could slip easily into a size 5 dress if not a size 3. This weight-loss drug was great for her figure, not that she was ever overweight anyway. At first she thought she'd just take it for a short time. But it made her feel so good. Extremely good, euphoric even. And her looks. Wow! The diet pills - amphetamines - Kahus had taken before were nothing like this stuff. "This is really cool," she recalls thinking. "I thought, 'I can do this every day and stay skinny.' " Before long, Kahus was hooked on methamphetamine, a powerfully addictive illegal stimulant that counts loss of appetite among its many devastating side effects. Appearances, though, can be deceiving. The mirror lied. Kahus was willowy, no doubt. But after 4 1/2 years of snorting methamphetamine, she didn't recognize herself. Who was this person? "When you do the meth there's no working at it. You don't have to diet. You don't have to exercise. You stay skinny," she said. "But you lose your mind." Methamphetamine use isn't immediately thought of as a means for women to control their weight. It's predominantly a white blue-collar man's drug. Fifty-seven percent of users in Utah are male and 92 percent are Caucasian, according to the state Division of Substance Abuse. The cheap, mood-altering drug is cooked in clandestine laboratories using relatively inexpensive, easily obtainable ingredients. Smoking or injecting "ice" or "crank," as it's called, produces a rush. Snorting or orally ingesting "chalk" or "speed" produces a long-lasting high. The National Institute of Drug Abuse reports that a number of more diverse groups, including gay men, young adults who go to private clubs and homeless or runaway teenagers are using the substance. In Utah, where methamphetamine is the third most prevalent drug, anecdotal evidence suggests use among women to control weight is on the upswing, said B.J. VanRoosendaal, substance abuse division spokeswoman. The state has not conducted research to bolster the perception. Still, she said the division is planning a multimedia anti-drug campaign for this fall and winter with radio and TV spots aimed specifically at women. Counselors in Salt Lake Valley treatment centers do frequently see women who turned to meth to stay thin or shed unwanted pounds, though that may not be the only reason. "We hear that a lot," said Bruce Jacobson, director of Cornerstone Counseling Center's adult substance abuse treatment program. "It's very, very common to use not only meth but other stimulants for weight control; from cocaine to over-the-counter drugs to meth itself." Most women who abuse those kinds of drugs are not overweight, he said. Some have problems such as eating disorders. Others use several substances to suppress their appetites. Carla Trentelman, program director of the Women's Recovery Center in Clearfield, said some women she sees had never taken drugs before meth, and they did it to look trim. Single-digit dress sizes - to the point of being unhealthy - aren't unusual, she said. "They all refer to (it as) the 'Jenny Crank' program," she said. Though trimming down might be among the initial reasons some women take methamphetamine, Jacobson said, it quickly gets lost in the abyss of addiction. "It grabs you so bad that you don't even realize you're just doing it because you like it after awhile," Kahus said. "It's the closest thing to having something evil take control of you." Most of the women she knew who took meth - women in their 30s - did so in part because it kept them skinny, she said. Kahus, 46, wasn't a novice drug user when she started snorting lines or "tweaking" in the summer of 1995. She has tried nearly everything. She was always on something from the time she was 18 years old. If it wasn't alcohol it was amphetamines or allergy medication or even vitamins. But Kahus never wanted to do anything that "was going to consume too many brain cells." Methamphetamine was something different. It swallowed her. She'd do anything to get it. She found herself thinking about getting high every waking minute. She dreamed about it. She found herself in "scary" and "insane" places just to score a hit. A divorced mother of two grown children, Kahus' only qualification for a new boyfriend was that he be a user, too. In addition to a decreased appetite, other side effects crept into her life. She became compulsive. If one pair of new boots was good, four or five were better. She had no ability to emote, to feel for others. She forgot long-known names and telephone numbers. She became paranoid. She constantly felt like someone was going to rip her off or worse, steal her drugs. She lost her job, house and car. Some of her teeth went rotten. In short, Kahus said, "you forget to be a person." Kahus, though, somehow rediscovered herself. During a visit to family in her native Oklahoma earlier this year she didn't take any meth. The planned two-week stay stretched to four drug-free months. She checked into an outpatient treatment center when she arrived back in Utah. Tammy Dusoe, Kahus substance abuse counselor, said Kahus was basically a mess when she met her in July - disheveled, scared, sick and 30 pounds lighter than she is now. Kahus completed the rehab program. She attends Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous. She has been clean for seven months. "She's a little miracle," Dusoe said. A broad smile and a quick laugh suggest Kahus is a healthy, happy person. She wears a still-trim size 9 dress now, and isn't bugged about it. A friend provided her a job as a nanny. She aspires to use some college education in social work to become a drug treatment counselor herself. "I feel like a survivor," Kahus said. "I feel like I survived something that almost consumed me, like hanging off the side of a cliff." - --- MAP posted-by: Richard Lake