Pubdate: October 27, 1999 Source: Richmond Review (Canada) Fax: 604.606.8752 Feedback: http://www.rpl.richmond.bc.ca/community/RichmondReview/Archive/rreview/Lette redt Website: http://www.rpl.richmond.bc.ca/community/RichmondReview/ Author: Tia Abell DRUG ACTION TEAM TARGETS PARENTS When faced with the suspicion their children use drugs, sometimes the worse thing parents can do is nothing. So says Jack Hirose, a counsellor for the Richmond Alcohol & Drug Action Team. By the time youth are referred to the center's clinical program, most of their parents have been waiting passively for the teenagers to grow out of their drug use, inadvertently allowing the problems to get worse. Called `enabling,' it's one of the greatest sins born out of the good intentions of a drug user's family. "Adults who come (for programs) are often motivated-they've lost their homes or a spouse because of their problems, but youth don't often hit the bottom like adults do," Hirose said. "If there are no consequences, there's no reason to change." Education and support can help. Beginning Oct. 26, the team is offering a six-week workshop geared towards offering parents information, strategies and support from others who've experienced the ills of drug or alcohol use in the family. Often, parents may be misinformed about the dangers of drugs. While marijuana is thought by many to be relatively harmless, Hirose calls it a "gateway drug"-like alcohol and cigarettes-teenagers usually try it first before graduating to the harder stuff. One of the key aspects of the workshop is the first step-helping parents determine if their son or daughter is an addict or is in the experimental stage. Hirose said some people may not be aware their child needs detox. As addicts may need more help than the centre can provide, the team can offer lists of resources available in the community. The workshop also teaches communication skills, focusing on the importance of investing time with children and building a rapport with them, as well as ways to reduce strife within relationships. "Parents often have a role in conflicts, they may have too high expectations and may not see their role in this," the counsellor said. "It's about creating awareness in parents. Often they want their son or daughter to change but the whole (family) system may need to change." Changing the family system means creating boundaries, setting standards of personal responsibility for all family members and enforcing consequences if they're not met. For more information about RADAT or the workshop, call 270-9220. - --- MAP posted-by: Keith Brilhart