Pubdate: Friday, 12 Mar 1999
Source: San Luis Obispo County Telegram-Tribune (CA)
Copyright: 1999 San Luis Obispo County Telegram-Tribune
Contact:  P.O. Box 112, San Luis Obispo, CA 93406-0112
Website: http://www.sanluisobispo.com/
Author: Robert Wallace, Ed.D.

SHOULD TEEN CALL AN EX-ADDICT A FRIEND?

Mr. Wallace: I'm 14 and don't have a close relationship with my mother.
She is a single parent and very strict. She hardly lets me do anything
with my friends, and having a boyfriend is out of the question.

About two months ago, a lady who is 28 moved into our apratment build-
ing. We became good friends and I find I can go to her with any of my
problems and she gives me good advice. She is very helpful because she
is a recovering drug addict who has been "clean" for over three years.
She has told me that drugs caused the breakup of her marriage. She
always tells me to never to do drugs or alcohol and to make sure I
practice safe sex when I'm older.

My mom doesn't much care for this woman. In fact, she now has
forbidden me to visit her apartment. I don't think this is fair, do
you?

Toni, Indianapolis

Toni: I can understand why your mom would be wary of the influence a
former drug addict might have on you. I'm sure she's trying to err on
the side of caution. In any case, discussions about drugs, alcohol and
especially sex should take place with your mother, not a neighbor.

Just because your mother is strict doesn't mean you can't have a close
relationship with her. It's a difficult task to be a single parent. Do
all that you can to help make this task a little easier. Start by
telling Mom you love her. Even though she knows you do, she'll be
happy to hear it
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